I have a 13 year old who seems more focused on having "down time" at the end of his day then completing his homework. Are there any other parents that have successfully overcome this struggle? Would love to hear your tips... Thanks!
I have the same issue with my 12 year old. He hasn't been turning in his homework so his grades are starting to fall. He is more interested in playing his video games all the time. That is all he ever really wants to do. My husband says its better than him out getting in trouble and tells our son that he is going to take the game away if he doesn't get his work in. Of course he makes up all his work but later on down the road we get another email saying he is behind again. He always makes it up cause he doesn't want to loose his game. My worry is that school is only going to get harder and than what? They really don't let you slide in high school like they do now...
I don't have kids per se, but I actually tutor an 18 year old and a 17 year old and yes, the motivation is definitely waning. Here in the GTA in high school deadlines are meaningless and there are no penalties and therefore no motivation to get the projects done and handed in.
I find that by making the kids accountable to me, their tutor, it seems to help. I also set very specific timelines and tasks for them and again, it seems to really help. It really is a balancing act on the parents part as well as mine, but with more people who are making them accountable I see a difference.
Although I don't yet have teens, it is right around the corner 4 us. I have been "collecting" advice 4 when the time comes. My sister in law says to make them earn hangout time with friends. It is a great motivator for my 16 yr old nephew.
We as parents need to keep in mind that every generation is different. Especially this generation with all the computer technology that is available to children. However we must remember we are a parent first and a friend second. Finding a balance can be hard especially if you are dealing with school work. It is very common for "pre-teens" and "teenagers" to not want to "care" about school work. They are still finding who they are and more importantly what they can and cant get away with. I have always given our oldest-a senior this coming year real life examples when it comes to school, life and education. Try using what ever the child is involved in to motivate him/her. The movie the Kings Speech is a great motivator-here is a man who could of "not" gave his all and settled for less; instead he pushed through his difficulties and overcame it all. The idea is to find that click what ever it may be, find examples of pro's and con's and use that to get your childs attention. Talk to them and be as open as you can... After all we want the best for our children and they need to know we get them and we hear them and we want their life to be better than ours; to let them know they only get one chance at this age, at this time to make their life truely the best it can be.
This would be the result if kids gets all what they want. No more motivations because they can have everything. But if you set some limitations and used an prize or reward style of motivation they could be persuade to study or to be good. Just like my younger sister shes been wanting to have clip hair extensions. Our mom made a deal with her to pass her math or atleast reach a certain grades so that she could have clip hair extensions. This style could also be used to others like kids who is addicted to games. No games until he have good grades.
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