True Tori

True Tori

I wanted to take a moment to address what’s been going on in my life over the last several months. Our family has been going through an incredibly difficult and trying time, and the story of what I’ve been going through has been told by everyone… except for me. So, it’s time for me to set the record straight. Which is why I decided to share this with all of you on True Tori, which premieres tomorrow, April 22nd at 10pm on Lifetime.

Throughout my life, the tabloids have told every story you could imagine – and they always got it wrong. I needed the chance to tell my own story. At the moment, I don’t know if it will have a happy ending. But I need to get my voice back, and this is my way of doing that.

I also wanted to thank all of you from the bottom of my heart for your unconditional love, positivity and support over the last several months. I’m forever thankful for the support of my incredible fans and friends, especially from my amazing online family here on ediTORIal.


  • Angela O

    Good for you! I’ll be watching and sending best wishes to you and your beautiful family.

  • Holly

    I love you Tori! Wishing you only the best!!

  • Sharon

    Trust comes from knowing that you can handle what someone else may do, not in being able to predict what they will do. The amount we trust depends on how strong we are, and knowing that we can handle someone else’s imperfections. Prayers going out to you during this trying time. I’ve been there, and am proof positive that you can survive! <>

    • Melissa Smith

      This was awesome. Very well put!

    • Sharon

      Well said!

    • Adrienne

      Great post of encouragement! We all go through trials in life it’s nice here from other people who can relate. And leave kind words of encouragement!!

  • Chrystle

    We love you Tori…..You, your kids and family are always in my thoughts and prayers

  • Simply_Mama_K

    Cheering you on, lifting you up, wiping your tears and watching you stand proudly again as a strong, independent woman.

  • Kim

    Tori, you are obviously a good person and a loving, wonderful mother! Hang in there and you will find your way to the best place for you and your sweet children. Divorce is not the worst thing that can happen to kids – growing up in a home where love and respect do not go hand-in-hand is. Be strong, all of your fans who admire you and especially those of us who have endured the uniquely agonizing pain of ongoing lies and cheating are in your corner and pulling for you.

  • PO

    you have come this far through everything and you will go further. You are a very strong woman and an inspiration to many, myself included. GOOD LUCK

  • Tracy Sodders Eng

    Tori you are a amazing woman that I have looked up to for over 20 years. I know you will do what’s right for your family. No one who truly loves you will judge you on a dession that you will make. My heart goes out to you. Tracy

  • cat

    Bless you tori! Can’t wait to watch and wish you nothing but the best in you life and love!!

  • judy

    When i read your story, i honestly didn’t even think it was true. Anywhoo, i felt for you and your kids and i felt sad. Sadly the very next day it happened to me. I found out about my hubby. Its definitely trying times. I give you so much credit for sharing your story. Wishing you and your family the best!!

  • Janet

    You are an amazing mom and an inspiration to us all in many ways. Big hugs!

  • Kim

    Tori, I have been in your shoes. Although I didn’t have to go through it under the watchful eyes of the media and public I did have to go through it under the scrutiny and judgements of so called friends and family. I can say that happily we made it out with a stronger and happier marriage and I came out a stronger and happier woman who found her voice. I ray that your outcome is what is best for your family and that what makes you truly happy. I will be watching the show and wishing you all the best.

  • Stephanie Fricke-Fisher

    Lots of love to yall. Yall are in my families prayers. God bless you and your family.

  • M

    All the best! Stay true to yourself and your kids. You deserve only the best and to feel secure with someone.

  • Kaz

    Love n hugs to you Tori…hoping for all the best for you and your gorgeous kids…i’m so sorry you are going through this :(

  • Linda

    Bless your heart! What a wonderful family you have! So sorry you are going through such a difficult time. I am glad you are telling your own story and I pray it has the ending you desire! We sure love you!

  • adj

    Keep smilin’ and screw the tabloids..I haven’t bought one of those since Princess Diana passed away!! Trash is all it is!

  • Angela

    I have been wanting to write you a very long time. But I am a single mom with 2 young boys so time is something I have very little of.
    You, Dean and your family have been in my prayers since the gossip
    started swirling. Only you know what you can forgive and move on from. I am praying for peace and I am praying that if it is God’s will, you and Dean work it out. I can see how much love you have for each other and your family is the priority of your life. No one needs to be a part of this except you
    and your family. You are an amazing mom and woman. You deserve only the best and I truly believe that as hard as this has been, if it is meant to be, you and Dean can work this out in your time and in your way. I pray for a happy ending, no matter what that ending is. You are always in my prayers.

    • Erin

      Well said.

  • Tracy Sodders Eng

    Also thanks for the show tomorrow, hope it helps.

  • Michele

    Wishing you and your kids the BEST! You Deserve the BEST!

  • Stef

    My heart breaks for you.”. I’ve lived watching you & your family over the years… I disnt believe the stories at first…I’m very sorry there is some truth to them… I’ve been there & it sucks!!
    Wish I could watch your story tomorrow… I don’t have cable anymore – so hopefully it’ll be online in the near future..
    Best of luck to you, dean & the kids.

  • krystle

    You’re an amazing person…I have always looked up to you… can and will over come this… what you want to do, for you and those beautiful babies of yours and no one else…. Xoxo

  • Wendy

    I wish you the best :)

  • Sydney

    Like Kim’s comment below, I have been through this too… my heart aches for you and your family. We got through it as well, happier and stronger. I can only hope that you will too.

  • Twashburn


  • Meloni

    Praying for you Tori. I can’t imagine the rumors and dealing with them. Your family is precious and you have to do what is best for them. I am praying that the outcome will be in God’s will for you all. Praying for strength and wisdom.

  • Tx

    You are brave and stronger than you know. No one has a right to your voice or your story – but it’s your story to tell or not I n your own terms. Praying for peace and joy to return and that forged by fire your family is ever stronger.

  • Tabitha

    No reason to make this public and embarrass your kids. Abusive! They will hate you for it later. I have less respect for you than Dean.

    • Jodi Voght

      Tabitha, it’s already public. She has a right to tell the truth and what she is feeling just like everyone else. Her children will be fine. It’s not our place to judge anyone… that’s God’s job.

      • Jenna Elizabeth

        Well said.

    • elizabeth

      Did you learn the golden rule when you were younger? IF YOU CANT SAY ANYTHING NICE DONT SAY ANYTHING AT ALL
      . you cant judge anyone….you have no idea what the real truth is only tori and dean do. I admire the way tori handles being under the microscope her whole entire life…..Tabitha I wonder what people would say about you if you had your whole entire life in magazines?

      • colleen

        FREE SPEECH!!

      • Jeremy

        If you don;t want your husband cheating on you, don’t marry a guy you had an affair with while BOTH of you were married. One cheater married another cheater and now people want to throw the idiot a pity party.

    • Anne Onymous

      Those kids will need all the therapy they can get. I wouldn’t be surprised that they are constantly teased at school. Don’t be surprised if the Spelling-McDermott kids get the shit kicked out of them at school with all their dirty laundry their mother writes about them.

    • Me

      Tabitha, I think you are just jealous. Go do your trolling somewhere else.

  • jo

    I often wonder how a man feels after he’s been with another woman ,what is he thinking when he walks into his home with a waiting wife and children, does he feel guilt or does he pity them?

    • Anne210

      Wasn’t he married when she started dating him?

  • Sheri Shepard

    your very welcome *tori*……a true and loyal fan of yours.<3
    keep your chin up :)

  • Tabitha

    You are only after money and fame.

    • Missy

      Go away please!

    • pandi04

      Really??? She already has that.

    • Cathy

      Why are you even reading this article??? go hate on somebody else?? May your life crumble and then get criticism byi some ignorant person who you don’t even know. KARMA is a bitch

  • Monee

    I pray for healing and forgiveness for your beautiful family

  • Melissa

    I am going through much of the same things your family is right now and I feel your pain, I have always been a big fan and wish you and your kids only the best.

  • Mary

    Sending love and hugs and prayers to you! You are such a beautiful and strong woman and I have nothing but positive thoughts for you. Of course no one knows the reality of what’s going on but those in it, but I do believe God can heal wounds and do miracles and my prayers are for bright, sunshine to come your way. Blessings!

  • Stacy Elizabeth Milaschewski

    Oh Tori! I love you thru and thru, I prayed so hard over the last few months, and I want to tell you you are inspiring to SO many Women for so many reasons, I had my own story going on too, or it has been, and I needed to just Smile, focus on my Kiddos, Myself, and push past all the horrible, awful, negative Stuff, You helped me remember, if she can do it, I can. Love you, always will, Praying for whatever is best for your Special Family, much love your way! PS I practically got teary on Happy easter yesterday seeing your face on people, i turned them all around! We all Love you T!

  • Missy

    Loves to you Tori. Ugh why do crappy things like this happen to good people????

  • Nick

    C U Next Tuesday!

    • Stacy Elizabeth Milaschewski


    • Tony

      You’re disgusting. Get a life.

      • charity

        Fuck you tony dont talk to tori lik
        e that punk

  • mama75

    Thanks for sharing your struggles and triumphs with us and showing us that you are just human like the rest of us. The older I get the more I realize how difficult life is and how complicated we all are. Do what’s best for you and your family. For now try to find small blessings in the little things to get you through these dark days and know that you have many (virtual) shoulders to lean on.

  • Kat

    Tori, I am a fan of you and Dean. I am saddened at the tabloid for the news. Just know that you need to do what is best you, your family. This is between you and your family not the world, even though the tabloids feel they are entitled to details of your life. If you have forgiveness and Grace within you, then that is all that matters. The only thing you need to know is you have a fan base because of who you are as a person and not the tabloid news. yes, you are in movies, and popular and have the Hollywood stardom, but you are also a person, and God’s loving child. So seek God’s help with this whole situation as you and your family only know the details. Give it to God and asked God to make the decisions that needs to be made and show you your path. I pray that all works out for you and Dean and your family. I have not listened to the news about what is going on except the blurb you get in the news, and 99% of the time I do not believe anything I hear. So trust in yourself and more in God and let HIM lead you to where you need to be with your family. I have watched you over the years and I feel you are just the same gril next door as the rest of us. Best Wishes and I will watch you tomorrow and pray that God directs your path to happiness.

  • Laura Zavorka-Wellner

    Everything will work out the way it is supposed to! We love you T!

  • Stacy Elizabeth Milaschewski

    Oh Tori! I love you thru and thru, I prayed so hard over the last few months, and I want to tell you you are inspiring to SO many Women for so many reasons, I had my own story going on too, or it has been, and I needed to just Smile, focus on my Kiddos, Myself, and push past all the horrible, awful, negative Stuff, You helped me remember, if she can do it, I can. Love you, always will, Praying for whatever is best for your Special Family, much love your way! PS I practically got teary on Happy easter yesterday seeing your face on people, i turned them all around at barnes and noble! We all Love you T!

  • Marcia

    I’m a single mom with grown children now, been there, done that. It takes great strength and courage to go through what you are going through. I can see you are a wonderful and capable mother. It makes it so much more difficult to go through this from the viewfinder of a camera. Best wishes, Tori .

  • Connie

    We Love you from Belmont NC

  • sarah

    Keep in mind that sex is not love. Love is him trying to get the help he needs and if u decide to leave him doesnt mean u dont love him. Staying with him doesnt mean u will forget those things. Do what uwant to do for ur family and what u want to do for yorself. God be with u during this time of ur life.

  • Kat

    How could the tabloids have gotten your story wrong to date? You have been calling the paparazzi to stage photos and stories for years. You really need to stop exploiting the kids. #SaveLiam #SaveStella #SaveHattie #SaveFinn

  • sandy

    Thanks ! PVR is set for tomorrow….

  • Laura

    You and your family are in my prayers. This may be a difficult time right now, but it will get better and you will be stronger for it. God Bless you All.

  • Meghan

    Whatever the truth is, You’ll come out on top you always do! You have the love of those beautiful babes ! :-) keep your head up Chica !

  • A friend

    If there is true love between you both then it can work out. Both of you have to want this in order for it too. You have to be supportive even if you want to scream and throw things. Understanding as well to both your feelings and your needs. This relationship can be fixed and it won’t happen over night. Don’t do it for the kids do it for you and only you. Pray a lot about it and have the lord help show u the way as well………..Wishing u all the best

  • Jenny Simmons

    Hang in there love. Those that love u will never listen to tabloids and will only listen to you,as will your true fans!xoxo

  • Winnie

    It feels like a really tough road in the beginning and it is.So take the positive out of the negative.This will only make you stronger as hard as that sounds.You have more support than you realize and we all look up to you Tori,keep you chin up.You can get through anything ok.

  • Donn

    Hopefully she doesn’t actually read these. Some people need to remember, those without sin shall cast the first stone. Unless you are flawless, perhaps your opinions should be kept to yourself.

    • krissie

      I agree. Hopefully, she has someone sort through and delete all the haters. That would allow her to see just how many support her without having to waste time on negativity. What so many don’t seem to understand is that she had no choice but to deal with this publicly due to the “other woman” who shopped the story for the biggest pay out.

    • Sameshoes

      I agree totally.

  • Lara Camacho

    Having been thru a similar situation with my husband, I know how devastating it can be. It shakes you to your core and leaves you questioning everything you thought you knew. It’s important to realize that it wasn’t your fault. You messaged me last summer after I separated from my husband and I was so grateful. Your fans love you and are pulling for you. Sending hugs. Stay strong Mama!!

  • KKatherine Custer

    We love you Tori! I wish you and your family much happiness.

  • Joy

    Tori, you don’t need to address what has been going on in your life. That is your business. Let the tabloids write what they want; they will anyway. You wouldn’t be the first woman to marry a cheater. But keep your dignity. If not for yourself for your children. You need a good lawyer. You deserve a nice husband. Dean is a no-talent pig. He doesn’t deserve a family like you and your precious children. The only fans that are for this TV show are the ones who watch unwholesome TV shows anyway. And there are so many of them out there. Why do you want to add another to the list. I’m sure your mother would have more respect for you. If it’s for the money it is so not worth it.

    • Tigergirl

      Mistakes are meant to happen,this is being human!

    • Sameshoes

      Dean is an addict. He has had piggish behavior. His or Tori’s talent has nothing to do with this issue.

  • HeidiGen

    Prayers are with you and your family Tori, only you know what is best for you and in time, answers will come. I hope it will be a happy ending, which ever end you choose to write. And don’t worry about the tabloids, they are what they are, your friends and family, as well as those who are not tabloid fans, will be waiting for you to tell us fact from fiction, when and if you choose to do so…..know that we wish you only the best.

  • leah bragg

    It takes a very strong person to do what you’re doing! Good luck!

  • RealityMax

    Tori, my prayers too are with you during this journey you’ve found yourself on. I’ve been on the same journey for just over 2 years since finding out my husband cheated on me. I still don’t know where my story will end but I do know that no matter what, I WILL survive!

  • Guest

    I wish you and all of your family all the best! I think you are a great wife, mother and a great person.

  • Amber Knapp

    Sorry that you’re going through such a hard time right now. I can only imagine what you’re going through not only in your private life but through all the media and have to relive it like it everyday.
    Just remember it’s your life and there’s always a happy ending because you’ll have your kids and your family surrounding you.Thing will get better one day at a time.I wish you and your husband
    the best I hope you work it out.

  • Angela

    Stay strong and do what is best for your family! You have know one to please but your family, Let time pass and allow yourself to forgive and heal.

  • Shirley Kelley


  • TK

    I wish you the very best.

  • Jan

    You’re a beautiful person with a beautiful family. I’m sending postive thoughts and many prayers for God to help guide you on to do what is right for you and your children. love always, Jan

  • Jane P.

    You seem to be an incredible young woman, a good and loving mother and wife. Unfortunately you are encountering some difficulties. Pleaseand y make to sure to put you and your children. Sometime difficult decisions are necessary. Take care.

  • Sarah Martin

    Dear Tori,

    I have been a fan of yours for a long time. I have watched you from when I was young and I even have sisters close to your age. I have always seen this light in you and I have always been impressed with your own maturity. You don’t put up with much. You are a true go-getter and you are just amazing and incredibly talented in what you do. I completely respect you always. You keep things as balanced as much as you can and you don’t excuse yourself for things you know you have done. You take responsibility and that is what I respect most about you.

    You are truly a beautiful soul who has touched many lives. Keep on doing what you do and you are going to go far…you already have. I appreciate your honesty. You are true to who you are, and at the end of the day, that is all you have. You are a shining star. My thoughts are with you and your family.



  • Laura MamaGremlin Nicholson

    Just another fan, who has watched everything you’ve ever done. Praying it all works out as I’ve always been a Tori & Dean champion. God bless you and your family. XOXO

  • Krissy

    I’ve always loved you Tori, and your beautiful family. I pray that you and Dean can find a way to work through this and be a stronger couple bc of it. I will always read your books, watch your shows and support you in any way possible. Good luck to you!!

  • Shawna w.

    I know how you feel.
    I went through the same thing.
    My husband was having an affair, while even in the hospital, for a year before I actually had proof.
    I’m not a big public figure like yourself….but my father is a minister…and my actions are judged and scrutinized, measured against what my father preaches about. Congregants watch my moves.
    It was very humiliating to not know what to say to people and excuses my husband would give.
    It is still…4 years later…a painful thing.
    I pray for you. I pray for your kids. I pray you choose what’s best for you and the not the pressure you feel from everyone.
    I will watch your show knowing dean will trigger ever pain my husband put me through.

  • Amy Witmer

    Hang tough Tori it’s hard enough for any family to have troubles let alone for you the whole media wants to put your personal business out there. Wishing you well

  • Brenda St-Pierre

    i believe that only us really know what is going on in our relationship and what makes you happy and your family is the most important thing no one is allowed to judge anyone i am ruthing for you . you are so great happy to see you speak for yourself and not let others spread rumers or speculate on your relationship . keep doing what feels right for you and not what other people want or say. lache pas tes bonnes. i will be there watch you evolution and happy to see you move forward and see where the road will bring you.

  • Stephanie Binegar

    Remember that you are a strong woman Tori! I don’t actually ‘know’ you but from what I have seen and read, you are an incredible supermom. All you can do is try to fix this problem and do what you feel is right. Keep your head up and ignore what the tabloids say!

  • flowerlady464

    Wish you the all the best. Can’t imagine having to go through this in the public eye. I have always admired your work ethic and love of family.

  • Colleen

    Your family Will always be in my heart , sending you energy and love

  • Liz Ozeroff-Capparella

    Wishing you, Dean and the kids all the best in the future!!!

  • BeTh

    Stay stRong giRLie!
    Either way the ending turns out, YoU will
    Be happy again!
    ITs youR sTori!

  • Mary Smith

    Oh Tori, I will always love you, unconditionally!! I may not have always agreed with you on issues, but, I have always admired you for your strength and never giving up. You fought and found LOVE and that is so precious!! I look where you have been and where you have come from and how many hills and valleys you climbed up and down from, but, you never, ever gave up. Find your strength, find your power, it’s there, hon, find it and fight for what is yours. Remember, you have such a big heart and you forgive so easily, that is a very high virtue, but, you don’t have to be taken advantage of. Pray about it, I mean really pray, lay it at God’s feet and ask him for a answer of what to do, a sign or something. Then just be at peace and watch and listen. When you are at peace with your decision, then you know God is with it, if you are not at peace with it,no matter what others say, then he is not with it. You and your beautiful family will be in my thoughts and prayers. huggsss Tori!!

  • Arlene

    Wishing you and your family the best! Do what is right for you and your family! Don’t worry about what anybody else thinks or says! Good luck!

  • Karen

    My heart breaks for you. I do not read tabloids at all and had no idea the rough road you are on. Praying for your whole sweet family. Saw a promo on Kathie and Hoda and was shocked at what I heard. Glad you are sharing your story. The Bible says that God’s strength is made perfect in our weakness and I believe that to be true. Though you feel weak, may you be strong. Blessings.

  • Karen

    Trust your ‘gut’, take time to see if you can work to ‘save’ your marriage. In the end it’s your choice, no one can make this decision for you. You can’t save it alone, so don’t try to do all the work yourself. I’ve been there, mine was worth saving and now 20+ years later, we’re happy!!!!!!

  • Robin Pond

    Tori and Dean your family is in my constant prayers.

  • Penny

    Love you Tori!!! We are all behind you on this!!! Love your friends from all over the world xxx

  • Sandra Maria

    so sei que custa horrores……

  • Stephanie Valdez

    The Lord remains ever faithful. I am the mother of four trying to work through trust issues with my spouse. Its truly one of the most difficult things to go through because we have our children to consider as well. Theres no easy answer. Thankfully looking to Jesus I am still going strong and overcoming doubts of self worth and several health ailments as well. No matter what happens with either relationship we have each been so blessed with healthy beautiful children that bring so much light into our lives. Ill be praying strength and happiness for you and yours. Hugs.

  • Jen

    I’m sorry you have to deal with this publicly. You deserve privacy too.

  • Erin

    You are a very strong women I pray for you and your family to find peace.

  • Annie Kunkel Kraft

    Not sure I could put it all out there like you are, but if it helps you and Dean in anyway to regain trust again, then I believe you’re doing the right thing. Only time and hard work will tell. You have to be the one to let the walls down and it all starts with forgiveness. (If that is even possible) just know you’re a great person who didn’t deserve this to happen to you. There are no excuses as to why or how? It shouldn’t have happened. Period. Stay strong, keep the ones you love first and foremost. And love yourself always.

  • Jenn

    What type of legitimate counseling or rehab program would allow counseling sessions to be filmed for the purpose of later public viewing? It is clear from your decision to air these sessions as part of a ‘reality’ show you are doing this for the wrong reasons. I feel so bad for the kids.

    After everything, you REALLY need to apologize to Candy for statements you have made in the past identifying faults with her parenting. Candy never exploited your childhood for financial gain the way you are using your kids for money and robbing them of their childhoods.

    • colleen

      You hit the nail on the head!

    • Evey

      It is a “reality” show people. It dies not mean it is real or true. It is show business. Made up entertainment. Tori has figured out a formula. Enjoy it if it’s your cup of tea. But remember it is television and make believe.

  • Caryn Haikins Bryan

    I hope tori leaves him. I never had a good feeling about him. From their first show there has been something I have never trusted with him and i have always been a good judge of charactor

    • Kim

      I didn’t like Dean from the beginning either but after watching more and more of Tori & Dean and reading all of Tori’s books, I just love them both. I’m so glad to see them together on TV again. When the smut papers picked up this story my mom told me about it and I felt very upset for Tori. I told my mom “oh no that can’t be true”.
      I only wish Tori & Dean the best of luck and I hope Tori does have a happy ending.

  • sunlion

    You seem to be a much nicer, kinder person than tabloids would like for us to believe. Best wishes for all you are doing.

  • Matilda

    You are a fake and a phony. Your children should be removed from your “care” as this is abusive! Solve your marital problems in the privacy of your own home like everyone else. You are NOT a celebrity and are a pathetic role model for those 4 kids. At least Dean is getting help for himself, what about all your addictions? I hope your shows are cancelled and people start to see you for who you really are: a selfish, egotistical, narcissist!

    • charity

      Youre a mean jealous foul mouthed bitch matilda dont talk to tori like t
      hat coward

      • Matilda

        And I’m foul-mouthed? Hmm I hope you don’t speak to your children like that! Perhaps, you should look up some of those words and then you might want to change your definition of “foul-mouthed”… In no way am I jealous of this pathetic woman. Unlike you, it seems, I do not idolize wannabe celebrities who make their money off of people like you! Also, perhaps you should learn how to type properly when you are trying to insult someone :)

        • Ann Nonymous

          Personally, I think Child Services should take Tori’s children and put them in a normal home where they are not entitled to Ipads, pedicures and manicures and any other toy/gadget they think they’re entitled too. They won’t have cameras following them around 24/7 and have their privacy. Plus, without the cameras, they won’t act like entitled spoiled brats and maybe treat other people with respect.

          • krissie

            If you’re going to hate, at least have the courage to sign your name.

          • CoCo

            Um, they are little kids, I don’t think they think they are entitled to anything. Do you even have kids? Because it seems like you don’t have a clue what you’re talking about. Why would you bash someone’s family when they are already going through so much? I guess haters gonna hate.

          • Wendy Delano Stechenfinger


          • Lucy

            You have to be a full blown retard. Child Services is there for what love? Abuse…..PHYSICAL and MENTAL abuse basically….of children. Dean is the most hands on dad that I have ever seen….and you CANNOT fake that on camera….not with 4 kids. Tori is a MOGUL….a wonderful and caring mother. Smart, driven, and focused. She does it all….to the betterment of those children. Those kids are….PRECIOUS, and amazing. I have 4 children, and they all, are acting just as they should… children. Get your head out of that Malicious mind you have there…..get your facts straight as well. Or better yet…..go get your head examined, because you have no idea what you are writing about. Please don’t go out and drive a car…..I fear for my life now.

          • gigi

            Dean is a pill popping drunk who screams at his wife. Hardly father of the year.

        • Sameshoes

          How sad that you are seeing this as “Idolization” rather than an opportunity to learn more about addictions, how to overcome them in a marriage, if that’s possible and what you do when hit with the news Tori was hit with.

        • MSort

          Why are you on her website if you really feel like Tori is all those nasty things you mentioned above? It seems a little “pathetic” that you would even spend a moment to cast such nasty words to someone you don’t even know. Are you “that person” who feels they need to insult someone they claim they don’t care for? That’s pathetic. And on another note, how would she (and 99% of the other “celebrities”) be able to even come close to solve their marital problems in the privacy of their own home like everyone else? Have you ever seen the way the blood sucking, money hungry, ruthless paparazzi follow these people around? They lurk in their bushes, follow them when they drive their kids to school, to the doctor, etc..

        • stella

          Matilda honey. How I feel sorry for you.

          I think it’s hilarious that you would pick on someone’s ‘incorrect typing’ when you obviously don’t know how to use proper grammar and spelling.

          Is that all you’ve really got ??….a feeble, pathetic attempt to prove your arrogant, bully like point of view with a mediocre comeback ???

          Matilda, do yourself a favour at the risk of actually sounding smart for a change, think before typing…and please use an online dictionary, it’s free !

    • Lawyermom3

      Wow Matilda, it’s such a shame that you cannot find it in your heart to support a woman in need. You really should look inside first before you judge others.

    • Lolo

      That was harsh. No ONE deserves that type of attack.

    • Ukraine

      Totally agree

    • Jenna Elizabeth

      Tori seems like a genuinely wonderful and caring mother, though I don’t know her personally. No one is perfect and we can all improve, but I think she is great!
      You seem to think you do know her and all her business, I agree with the other poster, I think you’re a foul mouthed troll. Who trolls websites just to log in and say negative things about people? If you don’t like Tori why are you here?? Do you really have nothing better to do than go to a person’s website and put down someone you don’t even know, based on the sliver of info you have garnered from TV or in the gossip magazines?
      I really hope your life isn’t as pathetic as you make it seem. You should spend your time educating yourself and become a less ignorant & hateful human being.

      • Merlz

        Go girl attack that woman and all those haters on here!!!!

      • Jeremy

        Was she caring when she stuck Dean’s married penis inside her married vagina years ago?

    • Marie

      If you don’t have anything nice to say than don’t say anything at all. If you have such a hatred for Tori then why are you on her site? Please do us all a favor and take your hatred somewhere else. Life is too short to be this mean!

    • OhConservative

      Jealous much? You are a selfish judgmental jealous poor excuse for a human being. You are heartless.

    • Jae

      That is horrible and disgusting Matilda!

    • krissie

      Shame on you. People also shouldn’t speak unless they have something good to say!

    • Tink

      Numbnuts not everyone solves their marital problems in the privacy of their own home. I’ve seen and heard couples go at it in public. Tori’s in magazines are you? That’s what I thought. Your the pathetic human role model for anyone. So angry! You should look into getting help for yourself and your addictions and I hope your cancelled for being you.

    • Sameshoes

      Wow is correct Lawyermom3! It’s so sad that there are people in this world that don’t have compassion for those in pain. Of course it could also be simple jealousy that Matilda’s life has not been covered by the press since she was born!

      • Jeremy

        What compassion did this dumb bitch show to Dean’s wife?

    • guest

      if you take the cameras away guess what there is still marital issues in the house…the kids will still have to deal with the tension between their parents. the old saying “you are only as sick as your secrets”…kids need to learn how to problem solve…especially marital problems when they grow up.

      50% of marriages end, the bulk of them end because of infidelity..Don’t you think it’s about time our society talks about marital issues instead of leaving them behind “closed doors”?

      Why should women feel alone…why should Tori feel alone while the tabloids spread false lies? I think it is empowering that she has the strength to do a show like this that will not lonely help her but will help other women in the same type marriage.

    • Lucy

      Selfish, egotistical, narcissist? It looks like you are such a happy woman….I mean your words are so inspiring. I can’t wait for your funeral… many people there…calling YOU a selfish, egotistical, and narcissist human being. You MUST know this kind so well? Maybe because you are ONE of them? Gosh…it’s so hard to tell? Good luck with your CRAPPY life. Tori has more support than you do….that’s for sure.

  • Annika Aidma

    Tori, you are an incredible woman! So warm and loving and a beautiful mom! I really admire you and your strength to go through hard times and to stay so positive and inspiring. I’ve been your big fan since I was a teenager and watched Beverly Hills on tv. Stay as strong and as wonderful as you have always been! We love you! Greetings from Estonia!!! :) Love, Annika

  • Jamie

    Sending love to you and your babies, from Texas!

  • Lynnette Edic

    You are an inspiration to us all—The media can be cruel…YOU ARE PRAYED FOR EACH DAY! The Lord God Almighty keep you and watch over you and yours.

  • Kristen Vandermolen

    Much love to you and your family Tori. You are a wonderful woman and mother. Stay strong and keep your head held high.

  • JT’s Mama

    I have never posted on a celebrity blog before. This happened to be a link on my Facebook. I’m appalled at how cruel and heartless people can be. I’m sure that whatever happens next, Tori will handle it with the same grace she has handled previous situations. I wish only the best for everyone concerned in this heartbreaking situation.

  • Rhonda Lomazow

    Best of luck kids deserve better

  • Anne Onymous

    You really need to SHUT UP and GO AWAY! Nobody cares about all your personal problems. You are an attention addict and you need serious help. I am so sick and tired about hearing about all your problems with your mom, your husband, your former 90210 co-stars, your insecurities, etc. If you want a normal life, get the reality cameras out of your home, go to college and get a degree and learn how to make money the smart way, don’t throw over-the-top parties all the time for you and your family, get out of the spoiled rich girl bubble and do volunteer work with people less fortunate then you, take your so-called culinary skills and go feed the hungry, your decorating skills and go build houses for those less fortunate, do A LOT of reading about subjects you know nothing about (like the U.S. Constitution which you know nothing about!) go to science museums and learn something new, stop talking about your kids’ goddamn potty training and other problems and most of all, STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF! You and your mother are 2 of the most shallow and self-centered people I’ve ever seen. It’s no wonder most of your old 90210 co-stars and everyone else in show business wants nothing to do with you.
    And another thing: DIVORCE DEAN!! He’s a loser and only married you for your father’s $$. I can’t believe you dumped a “Boston” boy for a Canadian dirtbag. What do you have against people from Boston, anyway? I’m from Boston and you’re no longer welcome here because you’re self-centered and stupid. Don’t even think about visiting Boston.

    • Darlene R. Method

      You are on on HER Page! What a BITCH! I am from Boston and you came back anytime! Who the fuck are you ANNE????

      • Darlene R. Method

        Can’t even post your name, POSER!

      • Harley

        amen sister! Anne is an idiot.

      • Anne Onymous

        I have every right to post whatever I want, whenever I want, wherever I want. Sometimes the truth hurts and you have to be candid. Speaking of being honest, get rid of the 80’s hair. You look like poor, white trash.

        • Sameshoes

          Anger issues much?

    • Harley

      you sure think you know a lot about Tori considering you “hate” her so much. Just don’t pay attention to anything about her if you have such problems with her. Get a life and let her be. This is her business and she can deal with it any way she so chooses. She doesn’t need people like you putting her down and making rude comments when she is a wonderful, giving, loving mother and didn’t your mother ever teach you…”if you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all”? Come on…geez. Get off her webpage if you don’t like her so much and keep your comments to one wants to hear what you have to say.

      • Roni

        I totally agree with you Harley! Obviously Anne must be such an unhappy person that she feels the need to attack someone she doesn’t even know. Must be awful to live such a lonely, insecure life that she feels she needs to attack others to feel better about herself.

        • Anne Onymous

          I am not an unhappy person. I’m a successful working woman who is happily married with children and I am very happy with myself. I don’t need to attack anyone. I call it like I see it. Tori Spelling is a self-centered attention addict who needs to get out of the public eye and seek therapy for herself and her children. She has no idea what regular people go through and it would be a good idea if she got out of the spotlight, seek private counseling, get an education, and spend some time with people who are not in show business. Basically, she needs to stop being like Sarah Palin.

          • Sameshoes

            Tori certainly managed to “hook” you in because I’ve seen at least 3 negative posts for you. If you are as successful and happy as you say you are the chances are that you probably wouldn’t be spending your time on the site of a person you quite obviously dislike.

            You are not calling it like it is. You are calling Tori names. You are calling Dean names, which by the way, is not an adult way to handle situations. You are either not aware of addictions, don’t believe in such things as addictions or something like that? You are obviously quite uneducated when it comes to addictions otherwise you would not write in the angry manner that you do.

            AND as you are writing in the angry manner that you have it makes me wonder if there is any denial going on in your life about your own marriage? Maybe you’ve seen some red flags in your own life that is triggered by this situation and what Tori is doing is pushing your buttons. Hmm……. something to think about.

    • charity fuzessy

      Anne get off her page bitch

    • janet

      maybe you should brush up on your spelling skills…no pun intended…onymous?

    • Tigergirl

      I have to laugh at you Anne, you sound like a five year old. What is wrong you can not find your baby bottle? Anne is such a cry baby,boo hoo!

    • OhConservative

      You are a bitch, Anne.

    • krissie

      If you are so tired of it, then turn your TV off or turn the channel and troll websites without her name on it. Your life is so perfect that you won’t even share your name? You make me sad for all human kind.

    • Peggy

      Anne you are one sick woman who needs a whole lot of therapy so you can get rid of your hate and jealousy

    • Peggy

      Get a grip Anne – you poor jealous soul full of hate.

    • Colleen Foughty Wick

      Don’t hurt a women who needs love and support. Be kind and loving or stay off this page

    • Shasta

      well said…she’s turned into a famewhore…what kind of mother would allow their kids to be part of such a show…shameful

  • Darlene R. Method

    Listen, been there done that! Just watched a few clips for tonight and I am sorry, you are married to a HUGE ASSHOLE! You can do so much better! Once a cheater, always a cheater….

  • Tracy Bynum

    You should be the one to tell your own story, good-bad-whatever. I can’t imagine what it’s like living in such a glare of a spotlight. No one knows your story better than YOU. Every marriage is difficult, even when things are going very well…tough moments pop up and bite us in the butt. When things are bad, they can be very bad when the public is focused on it. As a journalist, I always give someone the chance to tell their own story. I applaud you for taking this opportunity and having a say in how YOUR story is told. God bless you, Dean and your entire family.

  • Sharon Kruschen

    hold on mama! xo

  • Dawn

    We love you Tori! Stay strong.

  • HeatherRussell

    we loved you way back and we still love you today with our true hearts. you have been here to encourage and inspire your fans. let us show you how we got your back sister!

  • Tonya

    Love you and your family, Tori. Prayers, thoughts, and well-wishes from my heart to yours. You are beautiful, strong, sexy, amazing, a role-model, and a fantastic woman who has fought long and hard for her family’s happiness. These pansy-@ssed hoes who are hollering about “exploitation” need to get a life. This is ground-breaking and huge…..opening up your private struggle for your well being and the exhortation of others who have been through similar circumstances. Should your children view this years from now, I would believe that they would be proud of both their mother and father for fighting for the family and being brave. Be well, Mama – you will come out of this stronger than ever.

  • Lisse

    Hoping and praying for you and your deserve The best

  • Nicki

    I hope for the best for your family whatever the outcome may be! Stay strong girl! I know how heartbreaking it is when someone cheats on you!

  • JB

    All of your fans are pulling for you!! Don’t listen to the haters, which I have no idea why they would be on your page and take the time to post negative comments. Whatever happens, you always have support!!

  • Kristyn Smith

    The last 6 months (or maybe longer) of my first marriage my ex husband had a secret girlfriend and a secret apartment they shared. I often wished I could have shouted from the roof tops what really happened. But, to be the BIGGER person I basically ended it quietly and despite a great desire inside of me at times, decided to not mess any of his belongs up….even though he killed my credit and I could have used the money to clear it up. You are not alone. I stand by you girl! I hope you know there can be peace and healing and even bigger love on the other side of this kind of tragedy. Sending love and light your way. xo

  • Melissa Gibbs

    I am glad you are speaking out for yourself! It has to be hard to see all the lies and speculation. Hope things start looking up for you and your beautiful family. I will be tuning in tomorrow night.

  • Michelle Sample

    Sending you many, many blessings and love and hoping you find your happily ever after!!! :-)

  • Jess

    Tori, my thoughts are with you & your family during this incredibly trying time. My family also went through something very similar two years ago and after a lot of soul searching, therapy and rebuilding our marriage, we are happier, stronger and more honest than ever before. No matter what your decision, just know you are not alone and have supporters who have been rooting for you and your family since the beginning :) with time old wounds heal & whether you move forward separate or together, I hope you find your inner peace :)

  • Ariana

    Hang in there Tori. I’m proud of you for having the courage to share your life (and the truth) with the public. I wish nothing but the best for you and your beautiful family, whatever the outcome may be.

  • Wendy

    Has Candy commented?

  • Carol

    There are plenty of us who have been there (myself included) and you have done so with such style and grace. I went through this with 2 children years ago. I pray that this will work out for you, whatever the best way that will be. Just as long as you are happy and your kids are happy…..that is after all, the most important thing!!!! {{{{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}}}}

  • Ozziegirl

    I loved 90210, enjoyed watching your reality TV show and find your energy and enthusiasm for life amazing. I also can feel your pain over what has happened with Dean. I do however know that you and Dean both cheated on your previous partners so therefore I also see a bit of Karma happening here. I know you have always lived your life under the media spotlight but a lot of that also been of your doing. Like others i also wonder how airing your dirty laundry on tv is a benefit to you or your children. It will only be years down the track that you will learn how your children faired from having their family life and childhood plastered over the airways. I just think private things should remain private and that you do not owe anyone other than your family any response or explanation about what is happening between Dean and yourself. You should have a look at how the old Hollywood stars and indeed some celebrities today conduct themselves (keeping their private life PRIVATE) i feel this is a much healthier option. Not sure about your financial situation and that is your own business but there are better ways and healthier ways to make money (your books, craft, clothing etc). Take care and all the best. Wishing you strength and happiness all the way from Australia……

    • anotherOzzie

      well said

    • OhConservative

      You are being very judgmental and have no compassion. FYI, old Hollywood didn’t keep their lives private. What about Elizabeth Taylor and Lana Turner? And Old Hollywood didn’t have paparazzi following their every move. They were protected by the the Studios who commandeered what the press could ask and know.

    • Sameshoes

      I don’t agree with the “airing your dirty laundry” statement. What I see is that millions of women have gone through this since the beginning of time and showing what happens to a marriage as it’s going through this can only be beneficial for those of us who have experienced the same. It’s that feeling of “I’m not alone. I’m not the only one”. It’s easy to say Karma (it’s part of the language of my chosen profession) however Karma is bigger than that and we don’t know the outcome of what will happen in this situation. The Karma could have something to do with people becoming more aware of Sex Addiction or Codependency in relationships. Dean might become the world’s foremost speaker on cheating and lying!!! Tori may become an advocate for women taking back their power!! WE DON’T KNOW YET because neither of them are dead.

      Compassion for both of them is what’s needed. Support of their individual and joint journey and a belief that both of them become strong in who they are as individuals. The marriage thing will sort itself out one way or the other. Tori’s intuition will come to the surface as will Deans if they are working on themselves.

      • Missmom

        I agree with ozzie girl. Airing such private stuff with four young children involved is like rolling the dice w/their emotions

      • Heather

        Sex addiction…..pleeeease! It’s called SELF CONTROL, give me a break!

    • RWhite

      I would imagine this husband and wife thought through their decision before making these choices. Although, you have the right to your opinion – you are not our wonderful God Almighty sent here to judge, so use your intellagence and time wisely and pray that in whatever choices they make our God guides, protects, and helps this beautiful family throw this rough time. We may not all understand every choice made and its not about us. Its about Tori and Dean doing what THEY believe will help their family heal. I do watch… Not for the drama, but I too have my own struggles and I don’t want to tell a friend or family member. I see the strength, love, and dedication and I use that to tell myself “Yes, it is worth fight for.”…

      Keep fighting for each other… We all make some type of mistakes, only God can judge, and true love is worth the work…

      With love I pray your next reality show or book is how it is being old married grandparents, playing cards, and meeting your friends at the IHOP!! ;0) Hugs!!

    • deezas7er

      I am so annoyed that you can say it’s ‘karma’ to Tori at this trying time in her marriage and family unit!
      In this day and age most celebrities don’t have a choice in their private life being put out there!! I m guessing Tori probably wouldn’t of put it out there if it wasn’t for the scrag (the hoar) wanting her 5minutes of fame at the cost of pain, embarrassment & destruction to Tori’s family unit! I am not into all the vanity & reality star stuff! I do love Tori & love her shows & books. She actually is a gifted actress who is honest & kind & allows us 2see in2 her world! I no being famous u have 2deal with people like u & haters saying ur opinions & hurtful things BUT y be so mean & judge mental?! I m a lot older than u as with maturity n experiencing life lessons u become more thoughtful & less judgemental. I try & treat others how I want 2b treated. Just because Tori is open with the general public does not mean she should here such negativity & hurtful things! I bet u can dish it BUT not take it.
      If u read this Tori, no there r others out there that cringe when they see horrible comments like this & send positive energy, positive thoughts & love 2u & urs. I pray that these close minded people realise how hurtful they r & grow & learn 2b kind 2others. What u send out in the universe, u receive ten fold back.
      Love & best wishes from Debbie – NSW Australia 😉 xxx

      • Jeremy

        She had a choice when she stuck his dick inside her when they had their affair years ago on their spouses.

  • Maria

    Let those not judge unless they have walked in your shoes. Be strong, tell it from the heart and remember YOU are the master of your universe!

  • susan morris

    I’ll be watching. Best Wishes!

  • Sandra M. Smith

    Tori has her dad in her and will always land on her feet. I understand the devastation of infidelity. I also understand that the needs/wants of four children factor into ultimate decisions. Whatever the outcome, Tori deserves happiness and peace. Brightest blessings upon her family.

  • Cindy C

    Some of us just want the best for you and your family and want to support you judgment free. Wishing the others with rude comments would move along and not post on your webpage.

  • ktfashionista

    You are brave to put yourself out there to set the record straight! We are routing for you n your kiddos!

  • helena

    thank you for sharing this incredibly real and raw situation…this is something so taboo to talk about and shameful. its comforting to know that someone else is living this. I pray you resolve and I think as women and mothers we need to know that we deserve better and our children deserve great examples…also everyone has flaws it is what you can live with and stay true to yourself your needs and wants.

  • Jill Mckelvey

    Praying for your family, can’t imagine how u feel with all that stuff they report or say, just hoping u guys work it out! Your a great family :)

  • brooks

    Agreed. Money is the motivator here. Tori you have been using your voice by any media outlet that allows you to. Dean trashed this on his own something he will deal with his whole life going forward. But you my girl are catching up with him quickly. Certainly your friends/family are saying the same to you. This will back fire. People like me don’t understand why a rational person would take such an extreme route… either to get even; gain sympathy or for monitory gain. Honestly which is yours? A bit of all three? Be the bigger person be an adult be a constraint parent your kids need.

    • Mary Jo

      Tori is trash.

  • Carol

    First time responding to a celebrity blog, wow.. where do some of these ppl come from? do you honestly think anyone needs to hear that kind of crap.. let’s start this off on a positive note.. Tori, i hope that you & Dean can work this out!! Marriage is all about working things out.. unfortunately, we live in a society that so easily throws away. I am sending out good karma to you, Dean & your family. No one needs too much drama in their lives. Remember to breath deeply & brush away the negativity.(like water off a duck’s back) :)

  • Kitchen2u

    Stay strong Tori…you can do it for you and the kids :)

  • Dini

    You may forgive Dean, but your fans will not. How can you go on with someone you can’t trust? The answer is you can’t. You did EVERYTHING for him. If he’s accomplished anything professionally, it’s due to your name and influence, your creativity and ideas. I hope you’ll move on and teach your daughters that their mother knows her worth! I love you Tori! You look better then ever, you have 2 shows set to air. Life is good. You don’t need Dean but he sure as he’ll needs you or he’ll fade into obscurity.

  • Kitchen2u

    BTW Tori…I admire you. You have been through so much in your life. But I believe we are given these challenges because we CAN handle them. Love ya, stay truthful, be strong

  • Nicole P

    My heart and prayers too you and your family. I also liked to say is I pray all who has anything negative to say. Had this been happening to them they would not be so negative

  • Debbie Pickett

    We are lucky if we can go through this life without pain or heartache But very few get to do that. Myself I have known unspeakable heartache and have gone through those things has made me stronger today. So when people start throwing stones your way they are trying to take attention away from themselves. So remember a marriage is between 2 people and God and only when both parties what it will it work. Praying for your whole family, God Bless!!! Never forget no one walks this earth without sin !!!!!!!!

  • Cindy

    Tori, I do not even know what you are going through right now. I see your face on all the trash magazines and I just past them by without even reading the headline because I know they are all lies anyway. I have enjoyed watching you and your family on tv when YOU wanted to share it with us. You do not owe any one of us any kind of explanation about your, private life. If you choose to share it, that’s ok, but do not feel obligated. Either way, I love you and your family and I pray that whatever you are going through, you will find peace. Hugs and love… Cindy

  • Sonya C

    Your entire life as played out in the media with the media and others making things up or making things worse- this time you are telling your story- if others say you should not have it on TV- they do not walk in your shoes with cameras in your and your families face 24/7. I truly hope you and your soul mate can get pass this and your marriage becomes stronger. I continue to keep you, Dean and your children in my prayers.

  • Letty Turkett

    Tori, I have been where you are. I am a mother of two wonderful boys. The journey back is long and not for the faint of heart! Wisdom 6 years on the journey back to healing..if I can be so bold to share any! His issues have nothing to do with you! His issues and your love for him are two different things. This journey is so tangled and twisted and very hard to walk. If I could walk it again- I would: Walked taller faster, worked on me sooner, lived my dreams while he was healing, enjoyed more about myself and doubted myself less! During this time- let him do all the work- love yourself,nurture your children and trust in your higher power! There is no quick fix- but know that you are a beautiful young lady- you are complete and you are enough!!! Find a joy – just one every hour that your awake- and dream and meditate and pray-prayers of thankfulness all night long!

  • blovesg

    I hope all the best for you and your little family. I don’t really pay attention to the tabloids, but I’ve heard bits and pieces and I’m so sorry that you have to be in such a fish bowl, it only adds to the heart ache. I pray that you and your family can find some form of peace as you walk through this trial

  • Trish H

    Remain strong Tori! You are a super mama :)

  • Jan

    Tori, I have been in your shoes. Twice actually. The first time I walked away. The second time I stayed. It is MUCH harder to stay. We went to counseling and after 13 years, we are still together. I will never forget but the pain does lessen with time. I wish you all the best.

  • janet

    First and foremost, I think you should focus on yourself now and in the coming weeks and months. what do YOU want and need? The kids will be happier with a Mom who eventually finds happiness in her life. Put Tori first for once and just listen to your instincts! (ps…i have 3 acres…if all else fails, move here and bring the farm!)

  • Brenda

    Love you Tori! Praying for you & your family!

  • kErRy

    well said. tell your OWN story. i think it’s very brave for you to put it all out there xoxo

  • Bonita

    I am currently going thru a similar situation. I do not believe I could handle the situation if I had to deal with it in the public eye. I have been with my husband since high school. I believe he is my soulmate and after twenty five years together he only recently told me of his being molested as a preteen. He only told me after a three year affair with a woman he could barely stand to be around, in the end he hates her and has for sometime but did not want her death on his conscience because when He tried to end it many times she told him if he left her she would kill herself. I am torn between being sensitive to my own needs and being concerned and loving of his needs. He is definitely a sex addict. I have felt for years his view of sex was not normal but didn’t understand why until recently. I wish Tori and Dean nothing but the best as they try to rebuild their life. So just remember no one knows what is really going on inside someone else and it is not your place to judge. We don’t know the particulars behind the cheating and probably never will that is the personal life of Tori and Dean.

  • Jen

    Tori hang in there! You are an amazing woman. I hate that you are going through this.

  • Candace

    Hope all works out for you and your family Tori! Take care

  • TexasMomOf3

    I am shocked this is being aired on Lifetime as a reality show. It seems like a celebrity exploiting her kids on TV would be more appropriate as an episode of ‘Law and Order: SVU’ rather than a ‘reality’ show. #FakeTori

  • cookie

    I understand it’s like controlling something that has developed without your control.

  • Tara Colegrove Jungclaus

    I wish you and your family the best. I can understand needing to find a way to get your voice back, but I feel watching you go through this difficult and painful process on TV is not something I’m personally comfortable with. I admire your efforts in working to put your life back together after such a rough time, though, and I really look forward to your future projects!

  • Brandy

    Jeez it seems no matter what, people are rude. I just don’t see how going through an extremely difficult time in your marriage is child abuse. I would bet that every negative comment left on here have never been through trying times with children involved, or have never had a child. People this happens often and I really doubt tori is a bad mother. She’s a real person who loves her children period. No matter what life throws her way! You are in my thoughts and prayers and I hope you find piece in finding your voice again. Marriage is the most difficult thing no matter how much you love eachother.

  • Teresa Arnold

    Tori you have always been a strong woman. You can get thru this in your time only. I know what it is like to be cheated on. It hurts and tears you apart. Some say oh its okay. It’s not okay. Tori you did not deserve this. You are a very loving mother, wife. You put your family 1st always. I am praying for you and your family. I have watched you grow from a young girl to an amazing woman.

  • Dawn Permenter

    tori, i have been thru it too….as well as alot of the women in this room, but i am here to support you, and to help you….you will survive..and become stronger …i know i have…

  • Lolo

    Tori-Your true fans know what the tabloids do
    It is disgusting how they can take some things out of context, pay others to set you up, etc..
    The only ones that know the true story are the ones involved.
    I pray things work out for you and the children and what ever happens will be for the best. God is there for you to lean on.

  • Rachel

    Every married couple has difficult times in there marriage, but the most important thing is knowing that they will pass. Just know that this storm will pass but until then enjoy playing in the rain.

  • Pamela stott

    Hi I was just wondering is it on foxtel and what
    Channel I’m a big fan of tori spelling

    • Savannah Smiles

      It’ll be on the Lifetime channel, Tuesday at 10pm.

  • Debra

    Sweat Tori,
    Go with your gut!
    Respect yourself as an independent woman, you are strong!
    My heart aches for you, don’t settle !!!

  • N

    She is a celebrity bahaha! What planet are you from! 90210?! Tori stay strong!

  • Jenna Elizabeth

    We love you, Tori!

    ,Your fans

  • Lila’s Mom

    Tori, you are an amazing woman! You are a wonderful mother and you deserve love and support! Glad you are getting the opportunity to share your story…

  • Dianne

    We are here to support you Tori. You are stronger than you realize. You are loved.

  • Dawn

    All the hype and gossip aside. You could see in your show, you loved Dean. You gave him 4 children and a better life than he deserved, he repays you in this way?? Throw him in the car with Bieber and send them both home !!

  • Kat C

    It is sad that you have to share such a personal thing with the public. You and your family are going thru enough and everyone should respect your privacy. I know that is impossible, unfortunately. Just know that we care about you and respect you. The most important thing is focusing on your babies and what is right for you and them. You are a terrific mother so dont let anything that is being said or written tear you down. Look in the mirror and say to yourself that you are a human being, you are a woman, and that you deserve to be selfish and not worry about everyone else right now, you are not the public’s Tori, you are Tori Spelling the mother and wife!.

    Its about you and the babies and thats all that matters!

  • Jennifer

    Tori, I am so very sorry for all that you have been going through these past few months. You have shown such grace during this incredibly difficult time and I applaud you for sharing your journey with others. “True Tori” will undoubtedly encourage others facing similar situations and shine a light on what it means to truly fight for a marriage. No matter how this story ends, I wish you, Dean, and your beautiful family the absolute best. I’ll be watching tomorrow and am behind you all the way. God bless!

  • Bodi

    I just wish you thought about the fact that your kids will see this one day. He is still their dad, cheater or not it is awful for them to suffer through this.

  • Ashley Obee

    I wish your family the best and you will have a happy ending, just not sure what that will be yet! :)

  • Christmas Snow

    I am rooting for you Tori! Just believe in your strength! You have it!

  • Hollie Selby

    I have a whole new respect for you. Strength truly is sharing your mistakes with others not being afraid of the criticism and showing them there are other ways and that you’re not perfect. Everyone has problems and you just showed that. I have gone through more than one could imagine but I would never change it because it made me me. That is the way you must look at it as well- life is too short to be anything else but happy. When it throws things at you, roll with it. I have and I’m much better on this side now than I was years ago because I learned that. You will be fine- no matter what decisions you make.

  • meg

    Let tori set the record straight. She is famous and deals with many lies going on about her and her family life. She’s trying to be honest. Get off her back haters. She’s a good loving person. Just support her

  • Frederika van der Galien

    I have been following you for a long time and I really miss the reality show Tori and Dean. I al so sorry to haar That you both are struggeling. Every marriage has it own problems. I wish you all the luck and wisdom you need. Can’t watch it from the Netherlands tho!

  • Sharon

    Thank you so much for sharing your story. I can’t wait to watch. I’m not glad that you had to go through this but it does make me feel better knowing I am not the only one. Thankfully my marriage has survived and I hope to find that yours has as well. We are not crazy for fighting for our marriages despite what everyone else may think. I’ve actually lost friends because I chose to try to work things out. Anyway, it’s nice to know I’m not alone.

  • Shamira

    Sweet Tori, Keep faith en be proud of yourself how you are handleling things. The right thing to do will come to you. I hope that love wins! You are my rolmodel of being a good mom! Lots of love Shamira

  • Me Myself and I

    It is my birthday and i wish you al the best tori.

  • Jo Testa

    Trust God, what he has bought together let no man come between them. Your special, your cute, and your responsibility shows in all you do. I have watched your shows since the inception and will be watching because i love you. I wish you the best.

  • Leena Kirk

    Is there any way i can watch this series if I’m in Australia?

  • Jen

    Tori, sending you love and support in these difficult time, I’m a bug fan and always support you no matter what! Stay strong!

  • Heather

    Wishing you only the best. I will be tuning in to watch your show. Prays for your family to recover or move on.

  • Goat Girl

    Tori I have read all your books and I think you are a really wonderful person and very brave and hard working. I am sure you feel really sad at the moment, but things will get better and although it is rally sad you deserve better than you have got with Dean. Not because you don’t love him, or he doesn’t deserve that, but because he is an addict and may not be capable of change. I wish you and your lovely family all the very best. Xxx

  • MamaBird

    Tori I’m so sorry you are going through this. The tabloids only ever get a glimpse of your life. Thank you for sharing your struggle. That is itself is brave and you do have a voice! I pray you and your family find a happy beginning again. Every marriage has it’s ups and downs. Remember it is a journey. If I could recommend a book called Boundaries in Marriage. Biblically based book that will give your marriage some wonderful tools. Everyone needs boundaries! Best wishes to you and your family. I can’t even imagine how this has affected your babes. LOVE to you all.

  • Dee

    I. Have actually watched your show and I do understand you or shall I say I can relate to the drive you have and how we all just want to be loved for ourselves. I refuse to judge any of this. I am. So sorry for what you have been dealing with. I am keeping you and your family in my prayers since I believe in this. Stay strong and keep thinking of your babies as you have always. Done. Sending Love.

  • Tracey Charles

    Wow, 207 comments… well not sure you’ll read this, but I believe all will work out for you Tori! You’re strong and you’ve always stood true to yourself. You definitely have an online family who supports you. Don’t listen to negative people who thrive on people’s misery. I just learned a new term “Negferrets”. haha! You tell them “I don’t do neg!” 😉 I mean, what a waste of your talented energy! Good luck. Just do what you do best – it will all be okay!

  • Rachel

    No family is perfect and we love how open and honest you are with your fans. You are an amazing mom and wife.Such an inspiration.

  • Maria Marino

    I have complete faith you will do what is best for you and your family. Know that there was love and is love in your life. This to shall pass.

  • wendy

    You are an amazing woman. You are strong. You will get throughout this so you can keep taking care of your beautiful babies. You are an amazing mother. My thoughts are with you through this devastating time.

  • Violet

    Let God! Keeping your family in my prayers <3

  • Tracy

    You can have a happy ending and I believe you will! Forgiveness is the key! Fairytales are just that, we live in the real world. We are imperfect human beings who find someone to love us in spite of those imperfections. And that love must be unconditional if you two are going to make it. This is not about your pain. This is about what caused him to fall. He loves you, that is obvious. There are just some issues he hasn’t dealt with that have been there long ago and was present in your first encounter that began under extremely similar circumstances. Let your children be the catalyst for you to fight through this. Love him unconditionally. Forgive him. Hold him like a child in your arms and allow him to be candid without the fear of offending you. Your children need the two of you to remain a team. I am praying for the two of you! Don’t believe that your fairytale is ruined! You two will come out stronger through this! Your victory will inspire other marriages. You will overcome this a be stronger because of it.

  • not looking for fame

    Live by the sward Die by the sward Tori. Once a cheat always a cheat. Do you ever think about the 1st family and children and the life’s and tabloids for that family. I like you, you are a hard worker but you are ending a bit on what you build your own house on. As for Star, the magazine issued the following statement on Friday: “While Star certainly understands Ms. Spelling’s right to respond to our cover story, we don’t understand why she believes her husband Dean McDermott is off-limits to celebrity news magazines. He and Ms. Spelling’s ‘fairytale’ relationship began when they had an affair shortly after he and his then-wife, Mary Jo, had adopted their second child, and while Ms. Spelling was married to actor Charlie Shanian. What’s more, the couple have made a living by choosing to put their family’s private life on display on reality TV. We stand by our story.”

    • F Bueller

      Post of the week!

  • Marlene

    What Sharon said!,,,ditto!!!!!! Been there!!!! Forgive!!!!

  • melissa skolly

    I’ll be watchin to tori iv always loved you and dean I be sending my best wishes take care :)

  • Joli

    No matter what others say or advise, this is YOUR family. You have to do what YOU feel is best. If you and Dean can work this out, I wish you all the best. If you can’t, I wish you the same. My heart breaks for you and your precious babies, but you WILL get to the other side of this. Just keep putting one foot in front of the other…..or one knee as it may feel like at times when you feel crushed under the weight of Deans truth. You have people that are standing behind you and wish you the best. I believe marriage was created by God and that He wants to see you two heal. Lean on Him and He will carry you through it. Hugs to you and your beautiful family.

  • Stacy C

    Tori pray that god brings you someone who will appreciate you and not take you for granite like Dean has by cheating on you.

  • Just my thoughts

    Well he was married with a family when you met him. At the end of the day, who really cares and who’s business is it anyway. That being said, I wish you the best, and if you don’t like the world in your private business stop putting it on TV Tori. I am sure if you cut your lifestyle to be like the people that read and follow your blog, you would be able to support yourself and kids fine. I am sure your mother would help. Truly how many designer bags does a person need. Now maybe you might have some empathy for Mary Jo Eustace and her children. Many of us learn about others through our own mistakes.

  • Kim Gronquist Dennison

    I wish you the best. I can relate to you as a working Mom with young kids (1 in my case.) I just feel badly for your children, having all of this out in the open. How is this going to impact them in the future? When they go to school? Their friends parents are going to know about all of this, your whole life, and make judgements. I am afraid they will be the victims of backlash..might be time to not air all of this in public?

  • Margot

    Tori I am 32 years old and grew up watching Beverly Hills 90210. Your first season of Tori and Dean I was pregnant with my own little Liam and I have to say I adore you. With that said, there is no such thing as perfect weather. There will be days of sunshine and then there will be thunderstorms. I have seen my share of both however sometimes knowing that a rainbow will appear after the storm gives us the strength and faith to get through it all.

  • Lee

    It’s soooo funny to me that the trolls who r posting all this hate & saying shes an attention whore and that some day hers kids will see all this r the same ones who support Brandi glanville who is behaving far worse than tori spelling. Brandi’s husband cheated on her, dean cheated on tori,yet tori is the bad guy in this situation & Brandi is a martyr? Brandi gets drunk & embarrasses herself in public but she’s a great mom? Tori is at home with her children24/7 and she’s a terrible mother? It’s easy to see these haters have their favs & post accordingly. Two women, both done wrong by, but one is saint & the other a sinner? What has this world become? In my opinion tori has ALWAYS shown herself to be a great mother whatever else u may say. Brandi glanville has not displayed behaviour that puts in children’s interest first yet these same haters applaud her? It’s obvious to me that these haters are unintelligent,obnoxious,puerile,damned if u do, damned if u don’t,bitter, angry,miserable in their own lives,algae eating bottom dwellers. Tori’s children will grow up loving & being extremely proud of how their mother & how she handled this situation. Brandi on the otherhand? I think her children will be nothing but embarrassed & ashamed of her. It’s sad really. Don’t lose any more brain cells by reading the haters posts,Ur far too intelligent to let low life’s like these haters get to u. Keep doing it the way Ur doing it & to hell with everyone else!

  • caren

    Tori, wishing you the best in such a difficult time. At a minimum marrying Dean produced 4 beautiful healthy children. You are so very fortunate.

  • Melissa

    Best wishes for you Tori, I’ll be watching. So many women can relate, I think you are brave to put it out there. This situation must be so difficult, I can not even begin to imagine living it out in the public eye. You are one strong and admirable woman, your kids should be proud of you!

  • s-j

    True tori doesn’t air here in the UK :(

  • Josie

    I understand that this is an extremely difficult time for Tori and her children, BUT, what goes around, comes around. Their relationship started as an affair so I have no sympathy for someone who consciously and openly did the same thing to Dean’s first wife and children. Now she stages all her breakdowns on camera. They are both fame whores, I guess they do deserve each other. Booohoo, payback’s a bitch, isn’t it?

  • Darren Martin

    Haters gonna hate. Don’t mind them, Tori. Only a person unhappy with their own lives would comment negatively on someone else’s. Keep strong. Hugs.

  • Teri Boudreau

    your a very strong woman tori….. i wish the tabloids would just leave you alone….i wish nothing but the best for you and your family…. trust your own instincts and follow your beliefs… im sure you will make the best decision for you and your children….. your loyal friends and fans will stick by you thick and thin…… and im proud to say im one of your many loyals:):)…. hugs and much love to you….. keep your head held high….:):):):)

  • proudtobCanadian

    I think what most of these ‘haters’ so to speak forget is; even if this poor woman wanted to keep her life private the fact of having a last name as ‘spelling’ make her a direct paparazzi target whether she likes it or not, how it must feel to be always exposed? and have a monopoly of strangers make the headline and as we all know 9 out of 10 times its a bunch of B.S…. putting it out there in her own words, her own thoughts, and her real emotions takes some pretty big balls. In the end the only fool in this whole mess is the person who sat on a couch and had the audacity to say ‘ WHAT what did I do ?” You have balls girl !!! I feel your pain BE strong as I have seen you be….. God bless you and your family

  • Crystal

    I will be watching! !! I have heard the rumors and seen the tabloids. .. It breaks my heart to see the media tear a wonderful person and their family to shreds! We all go through rough times… Sadly yours are always publicized.

  • Katia Le Norcy

    D’une petite française qui voit ça de loin, (from a french girl far away), je trouve que Tori est courageuse, (I find her Brave), and I’m hope for her and hers adorables kiddos the best at the end. (et j’espère pour elle et ses adorables petits le meilleur en fin de compte.)
    In bad english but sincere Kahte from Bordeaux.

  • Diane Bizier

    We love being here and just want what’s best for you and yours

  • staystrong2014

    Tori just know that some of us are rooting you on and supporting you 100% please remember not everyone out there is evil and wanting you to fail or hurt, be strong Tori, some us love you, you are a wonderful mother to all of your children and are truly beautiful inside and outside, ignore the negative things people say and focus on the positive things, here to root you on, keep on being you don’t let anyone ever tell you to be anyone else, you are a star not because of the movies and shows and tabloids because you are just you, stay strong you are a shinning star!

  • Kristie

    Tori I pray for your strength to continue to be the amazing strong mother your are. God bless you and your family, whatever the outcome god does not give you more than you can handle! You will come out a stronger women. You and your children are in my prayers! Keep your head up from one mother to another! Don’t compromise yourself!

  • Jody

    Are you serious. I wonder how his first wife felt. Oh ya! Like that! Learn from her and pick yourself up with dignity for your kids. Especially the girls. Be a role model not a victim of karma.

  • Jenn

    Wow! I can’t believe how fake this show is! Tori…you have 3 nannies!!! THREE! Not one is around in the morning to help? I thought this was supposed to be your real story. This is beyon ridiculous. #FakeTori

  • Katy

    This episode is breaking my heart! You need to do what’s best for you and your kids and no one else!

  • RSep1

    Only time eases your pain. I have been on your shoes. We worked through the very difficult time .. I found my voice and took back my power.
    Wishing you STRENGTH and blessings to continue to brave though this.

  • pray for them


  • Shannon

    I just watched the first episode of True Tori and I cried for you. I cried because I felt for you as a mother, as a woman and as a girlfriend. I don’t know if I agree or not with you putting yourself out there, but I also don’t think it necessarily matters what I think about the way you have chosen to process this devastating event in your life. I think that every mom has had the morning that was depicted in the first few minutes of your show. If you are not commended for anything else, you should be lauded for being honest about the struggle you have getting out the door in the morning. I hope that you and your children find the happiness that you are seeking whether that be with Dean or not. I’ll be watching next week and hoping the best for you and your family until then.

    • Jenn

      I think that every mom has had the morning that was depicted in the first few minutes of your show. <– Except when you have multiple nannies that are helping you with the kids. Tori kept them from being on camera to elicit sympathy. #FakeTori

      • RSep1

        I have to say, even with 10 nannies, As someone who has been there… With a nanny and a housekeeper my world fell apart. The heartbreak is still the same.
        Stay positive Tori !

      • Mary

        I was thinking the same thing. She has three nannies for four kids? She is not alone but wants sympathy. Pathetic. I raise three kids alone, get a grip.

  • Alli

    Stay strong! I am watching it tonight and I am going through it now. Do what you feeli is best for you only. Do not let anyone ever tell you otherwise. You have always been strong and an amazing inspiration! Please remember that you are an amazing person, mother and woman!!

  • V E Starr

    Marriage is hard and it’s even harder when you have a life to fight for. Follow your heart and listen to your own voice. You will make the right choice not only for you but for your children, everything works out the way it’s meant to in the end. You’re a very strong woman.

  • Leenie

    Tori – Stay strong. You are really an amazing person and, wherever the road ahead leads, you will persevere. Thanks for sharing your story and all the best to you and your family.

  • Kim

    Bravo for you Tori Spelling. I am in tears watching your show. Thank you for being so real and showing what so many of us have been through and have not had the courage to talk about. It helps me to hear someone else go through it and hear you say the same things I said. The one that drove home was when you spent all those years thinking you were crazy for not trusting Dean and continually trying to find out what your problem was. In a way it’s a relief to see that we were not crazy that whole time and we didn’t trust for a reason. If being public with this makes you heal I say more power to you because silence has done nothing for me!

  • Kelli M

    Hey Tori, I’ve always loved you! I loved watching you and your family on tv! I’ve also loved reading all your books!! I think it’s amazing to watch yours and deans love on tv as well, and I wish you and your family the best of luck, during your hardship! I will definitely stay tuned into True Tori, to listen to your story. You and your family are forever in my prayers!!

  • Rebecca

    There is nothing weak about love, and there is nothing weak about forgiveness should you go down that road. Hang in there.

  • Robyn

    Tori- You have a beautiful soul. I have bee n a fan of yours since your bed and breakfast reality show (sorry cant remember the name).Of course I tuned into 90210 back in the day and liked you back then but through your reality shows, the outside world gets to know what a loving, devoted, talented, strong, and amazing person you really are. You are one of the few that has not let fame go to your head and I admire that. You have a beautiful family and I am praying for all of you through this difficult time. Just remember that you are an inspiration to me, and so many others who struggle with so many different obstacles in life. I know that no matter what happens, you will be ok because you have a bright future and four precious children, not to mention good friends. You are beautiful on the inside and on the outside. I wish you much love, happiness, success, and most importantly peace of mind and healing in your heart. All the best to you, darling lady. :)

  • Maddie Malave

    My prayer is with you, stay strong. you both need to deal with each other situation and talk, really talk each other. Don’t hold back. Maddie Malave God Bless

  • tlmart

    I’m in tears watching this…I have been where you are…my husband did the same after 7 yrs. of marriage, while I was pregnant with our 4th child. I was devastated to say the least. I don’t have to describe the pain because I see my pain in your face while you talk about it. I want you to know we were able to get past it and we will be married 18 yrs. in September. It wasn’t easy and I thought I’d never forgive him, but I did. It took a really long time to trust him again…he did everything to prove he was sorry…My heart truly hurts for you and I pray for peace. It’s amazing how the kiddos keep us sane when we’re dying inside. God Bless you Tori.

  • Debbie Wiggins

    Stay strong and hold true to your vows. It want be easy, but our Lord would want you to fight for your husband and family. Know that your a good wife and mother. May Gid Bless you and be with you during this time of sadness. One more thing there is something worse. What if you would never see him again? Life is precious! Work it out!

    Debbie W.

  • SaveTheKids

    Can the therapists on this show go ahead and enroll Liam and Stella in proactive counseling to help them prepare for the future?

  • Lisa

    Stay strong take care of yourself. I hope things work out for the best but take time to decide and to find yourself again. You can do this.
    You are a caring strong mom. Eventually things will end up how they are supposed to be.

  • Toris#1Canadianfan

    Wrote this on your fb page. Not sure if it’s actually yours. Love you, and wish I was 1/2 as strong as you.

    Here was my message:

    Not sure if this is the real tori spelling, but if it is, my heart breaks for you. I felt everything you were going through, and sobbed the entire episode. You are a strong strong woman. Only the weak freak out, and leave(like your friends said they would [minus your guy BFF who is awesome and knows his shit]). I pray that God brings you piece and that if it’s meant to be, that it will be. I pray for dean as well bc he is a good man, but has many demons to abolish. I think church and prayer would really rectify many things and heals all.

    Remember: the Family that prays together stays together.

    Your die hard Canadian fan that has watched all your shows and will do so forever.


  • Sara

    As I am watching the show, my heart is breaking for you. You are strong and have such a big heart. You aren’t weak in any way no matter how things turn out.

  • jannahon

    Just watched your show and wanted to write to you, Tori..I am pulling for you and your family to be able to work this out… Know that not everyone in the world pays attention to your personal life, I for one, did not know you had beautiful family.. many people do buy the tabloids and read the “stories” that are told to sell their magazines… but most people who read them know that they are usually not true. If people are reading them as fact they are either not very bright or are trying to avoid focusing on the problems in their own life. The good news is that if you are going thru something like this it should make you realize that you ARE human with real life problems and emotions… and that is a good thing.. You may be put on a pedestal because of your life circumstances, but you truly are only another human being… going thru things that everyone else in the world famous or not is going through. Stay strong.. your kids need you… and they need their dad too.. You will be better off TOGETHER as a family as long as your husband can get the help he needs….and you need to heal.. but it takes a long time.. its hard to open up your heart again and trust someone who has betrayed takes a long time because we put up a wall so we are never hurt that bad again.. but you have to forgive (not forget) and if you decide your family is worth fighting for, then fight the fight! It will be worth it.. Love is what matters most. Thank you for sharing.

  • Alisha

    Love you and your strength! I could never be as strong! You are such a fabulous person and mother! Don’t ever let anyone tell you different! You will be in my thoughts and prayers! Hugs!!

  • Susan

    Live your truth. I watched tonight and I can understand how you at times are living this fairy tale with the Dean you fell in love with and at other times you wonder who this “other” husband is because of his actions. I totally have lived this type of bait and switch relationship. I’m keeping you in my prayers for sure. You are an AMAZING mom and you are doing such a great job raising them. Stay strong and I know it’s hard but try to take time to do something that makes you happy. Love you!

  • Sara

    On the show, you share how time and time agin you would hope Dean would change. I have been there wanting so badly for someone with addictions to change. It is so hard. You want to feel pity for the person, love them, but also are so hurt and angry at them for hurting you. You want to shake them into understanding what they are doing to their self and those that love them. I know now that only knowing Jesus is our only hope for change. True change. He is the only one that can change our heart. He accepts us as messed up as we are, love us, forgives us, and makes us new. I am not saying a change comes easily or all at once, but that He is the only one that can bring change in a person. I pray that God uses this time in your lives to draw you close to Him. Get to know the one that created you, loves you unconditionally, and that can give you strength and hope. Think about how filthy we all are. Think about how great the love that Jesus has for us that he died for all that filth. He took the punishment for us so that our relationship with our Father can be mended. I pray that you and Dean come to know this truth. I pray for your strength and discernment during this terrible time. My heart hurts for you.

  • Erica

    I never comment on anything but felt compelled to give you messages of support and found this site. There will always be critics as those that are jealous want to see others fail to make themselves feel better. You are brave and a good mom. You will have happiness and laughter again you just have to get thru this. I admire you and have always been a fan. Live your life for you and your children and the world can mind their own business. I wish you much happiness and hope you are always surrounded by love, positive energy and support.

  • Sharon Savino

    I wish I could sit down with you for one afternoon and share my story with you. I’d tweet but not even my whole family knows that my husband cheated. I never expected your show tonight to hit me so hard but as I kept watching it brought me right back to about three years ago. Things said by both you and Dean left me thinking “OMG” because the same things, almost verbatim, were said between my husband and I. I distinctly remember thinking I could just let him come home and easily pretend that things never happened. I couldn’t let myself though. I hope things are better for you now, whatever direction this turns. My heart goes out to you and I couldn’t imagine going through what I did publicly. I lost so many of the people I knew as friends over it. You are lucky in that to have such great friends. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for sharing your story…. No matter how hard it is for me to watch. It also comforts me in a strange way. Just know, you are not alone.


    You are being challenged. Challenge brings growth, just keep moving forward and find moments of peace. When you are in a better place (and it will come) you will realize the lessons in your struggles and you will be able to say “that was a rough time, but through it I learned, I grew, I know my truth and what I value most”

  • WizeGirl

    Tori, You are an Amazing Woman! I think what you did is so Strong and Brave & Honest. I know everyone has a right to there own opinion but some people are just plain MEAN & HATEFUL … I don’t watch reality shows but I watched your show because It was you honestly I never buy or read the Tabliods because there all Gossip and Lies …. I feel bad for what has happened to you & your Family and I think you should hold your head up high and never let anyone bring you down or make you feel ashamed! It wasn’t your fault there are Girls out there that will do ANYTHING to break up a Happy Family and get a few bucks to print a Story! They are called TRASH!! Don’t let that girl do that to you! People make Mistakes and Im not saying Adultry is Ok ….. But keep in mind that Forgiveness is in us all and it won’t happen Overnight but listen to your heart and you will mend! It takes a Strong Woman to forgive and keep going…. I can’t believe that people think your doing this for money or Publicity! Unbelievable! I will pray for you & your Family! Keep your head up you are Amazing!!

  • OhConservative

    Tori, I am so sorry for what you have been going through. Please don’t think you are at fault. You were so loving to Dean. You have 4 beautiful children. I am upset that Dean betrayed you like he did. Some comments attributed to Dean putting blame on you are hard to believe. I hope he isn’t blaming you. If he is, then he is a Rat. He is responsible for his behavior and blaming you or anyone else is absurd. You are a beautiful, smart, sexy woman. Don’t let anyone tell you differently. My prayers go out to you and may God Bless You and your beautiful children. Hugs,

  • juls

    For better or worse. That means something. Love and blessings!

  • Dee

    Wow Tori! What a true raw you! I feel your pain. I admire your courage and strength and your will to tell your side with no holds bar! Way to go! I have a story and maybe this could help you. I was engaged for many years; wedding booked and 3 months prior he decides to cheat on me with someone that was one of my employees; my three best friends had all the facts before they approached me. They had a good friend watched my son for the night while my life just came crashing down! And the crazy thing is I’m a wedding planner. Real irony Hugh! So the next time I approached him with the facts he of course denied up and down side by side any which way he could. I canceled the wedding. And every day he denied it. And months later because I am like you we figure. So I tried and needless to say it never worked. Ten years later he still denies it and I am 46 and never married because I could never trust again. Please don’t go through with what I went through with and be a single mother hoping they’ll change and it will all work out because it doesn’t. If I could do it all over and think of all the warning signs and not be so trusting maybe I would be married or in a relationship trusting someone. It hurts. My son hated me and rebelled for a year as I was going through hell. So it’s just not us that hurt but it is our kids too. I would move on and be the strong women you are and let him be the weekend dad so you can put your life and yourself back together you will find love if you don’t shut everyone out like I did. Oh and I’m still the wedding coordinator and make many dream weddings come true. My son is getting married next year and I get to be involved. I love my daughter in law to be and I’m so fortunate I still have my 3 best friends! They too will give you strength, will power, help, love and support and will always be there to trust. Great show. Look forward to seeing you next week and maybe some day give you a hug for strength!

  • Jae

    Thank Tori for sharing your sTORI! I am dealing with my husband of 13 years’s infadelity and I am really finding it hard to cope. You have touched on so many feelings that I have been dealing with and I really want him to watch your show to see what my feelings are besides the anger and hurt. Again thank you from the bottom of my heart!

  • Yem


    To me you are a strong & brave woman! I hope that everything goes well with you and Dean.

    I have experiensed the same. The really hard time (regularly anxiety and depression) lasted about a year.

    The things what helped me was that I always had the chance to cry in my boyfriend’s arms and that I always did get to speak what was in my mind. And I almost always told my boyfriend when I felt distressed. He always answered to my texts etc, so the anxiety towards where is he now/what’s he doing didn’t grew. He always answered to all my questions and didn’t get mad when I asked the same questions again. We spoke A LOT about it and that helped me so much. I know now that he is truly sorry, especially because he did quit using alcohol (he met the red head in a bar…) so that was a big help gaining the trust back!

    I believe that if you both are committed to save your relationship – you can do it, you can survive. We did. I hope that you can too. :)

  • sydygirl

    Hi Tori,

    As I watched you tonight I had such a strong urge as a woman, mother, and even as a Stranger Friend to climb through the screen and just take you in my arms and comfort you! I couldn’t help but cry with and at times for you. I know you don’t want or need pity but this is NOT your fault so OF COURSE I feel so incredibly sad and upset for you!!! Earlier in the evening there was a commercial on re: the beginning of your new show. I was sitting with my 10yr old son. As he silently watched & shook his little head in disgust. I asked him what was wrong and he said…”Look at that poor lady….the camera people don’t even care that she’s crying. They are stalking her”. Then he surprised me and said “Those camera people need to leave her alone and mind their business”!!! I just had to hug him and tell him what great kid he is. Dear Tori…I know we are not friends but I do want you to know I am here to support you so if you ever need a friend…I’m here. I also texted you. You will be in my thoughts and prayers and as ALWAYS….I wish you & your family nothing but the BEST!!! Love & Support from Canada!! Jenn xo

  • Cycler

    A dear friends mother gave me some advice when I needed it most,……until you are ready to leave, nothing will make you go, but when you are ready to leave, nothing will make you stay. You know what it is you need to do for yourself and your children…….don’t allow any voice to be louder than your inner voice. Best wishes for your journey

  • jzb

    Tori, you probably don’t have time to read every single comment that people will post on this thread, but I can’t help myself from reaching out to you. Like many other posters I found myself in a similar situation to what you are dealing with. Over three years ago the bottom dropped out in my marriage when I discovered that my husband was addicted to oxytocin. It was inconceivable at the time for me to even consider that my marriage could be repaired, let alone be made stronger than it was before. No one will understand what you are going through in quite the same way as other spouses who have been through what you are going through – one of the best things I ever did for my sanity was finding a group supervised by a therapist to help me process and work through my own feelings. I also can’t say enough about finding an excellent therapist that can act as a neutral third party / sounding board for yourself personally. I want to offer you a message of hope that things can get better for you regardless of what happens in your marriage if you stay true to yourself and start to listen to that little voice inside of you that has been nagging at you for oh so long. The idea of codependency is often misunderstood and over the last few years I have been able to come to terms with and manage my codependent tendencies ( I am still a work in progress). Understanding codependency was a huge eye opener for me and the first step to understanding myself and moving towards a place where I could truly heal. It took a long time to get my marriage to the place where it is now, and I cannot stress enough that both people have to be committed to making positive changes and working hard to repair the damage that has been done so that trust and love can be re established. But I promise you that if you both are willing to do the work, then it will be worth it. I just watched the first episode of the true tori and I think that it was very wise to not let Dean come home when he asked. You are 1000% right that you both have to be in a different place to be ready for that to happen and that you have a right to be heard. This is your chance to redefine the terms of your marriage and make a clear and unabashed case for what you want and how you want it. I believe in you and although I know you are in for a bumpy ride, I feel confident that you can emerge on the other side of this ugliness a truer version of yourself than you ever thought possible. May God be with you on your journey. Sincerely, JZB

  • jamorlan

    Watched your show tonight. You are so brave. Perhaps some understanding will come for those who watch. No one knows what it’s like to walk in your shoes, maybe others will see that. Your children are growing up and all are beautiful, that is the true prize. So happy that you have supportive friends. You will get through this and will be even stronger. I’ve learned not to judge others journey, yet sometimes it’s hard for us all to understand the twist and turns In the road. I will keep you and your family in my thoughts and prayers. Namaste jamorlan

  • Krista

    My heart goes out to you….I have two beautiful children and a wonderful husband but this could happen to anyone at any time….even myself. I’m so sorry. You are an inspiration to me, continuing to take care of four kids by your self. This to shall pass…….xoxo

  • momof4CO

    So sad to see how many rude and inconsiderate people are making negative comments about Tori, the show, her parenting abilities or the kids……….. don’t judge anyone till you walk in their shoes. No matter what Tori does she is “wrong” in the public eye it kills me. she has to do what she thinks is right we all make mistakes and on this new show she seems really genuine, I WISH HER LOTS of future happiness and cant wait to see her future endeavors! Hang in there Tori and stay POSITIVE!!

    • Jeremy

      Whats sad, is that people are throwing a pity party for Tori, who cheated on her husband with Dean. Karma is a bitch and she found out the hard way. Know the dumb bitch knows how Dean’s wife felt, doesn’t feel good now does it?

  • Margaret

    Tori I too have been there and it was a painful lonely place. But it was temporary and we are so much stronger now. With the love of your children and God, you can handle this and come out so much stronger. I am a better woman for the pain I have endured and you can do this with grace. You are loved.

  • KG

    Tori, felt compelled to wright! Ignore the haters and be strong!! Many of
    us have been where you are now. Bottom line.. Love your kids more than you can hate anyone else.. Dean, the other women, etc. I have a healthy, HAPPY, well adjusted daughter, because I put her first. I watched tonight, and saw myself
    (although much easier with one) 13 years ago, your doing a great job!!!!!! You will get through this either with a stronger marriage, or a solid parenting union. Either way, do what is best for you, and for those beautiful children. Only you can decide what is best for you, so follow your heart!! You will make the right decision for you and your kids and those who love you, will support your decision; no matter what you decide. If we as women stuck together and had each other’s back, this BS would not happen.

    Got your back girl! :)

  • Stacy

    I became a fan of Tori Spelling during her 90210 days. You see, I am not exactly what you would call attractive and I was viciously bullied in school. Then I saw this Tori Spelling girl whose father was filthy rich and she was a Hollywood star, and people would say the most vile things about her appearance. In spite of all her money and celebrity, she could not stop all those horrible people from saying those disgusting things. And anytime she did an interview she seemed so sweet and gracious, but there seemed to be such hurt and insecurity in her eyes and I felt such a connection to her.
    Seeing the show tonight made me very sad. Of course I don’t know Tori and Dean, and I hope I am wrong, but it seems to me that he played her. I think he figured her out in about two seconds and said what she so desperately needed to hear. I think she genuinely fell in love with him but I don’t believe his intentions were so pure. After seeing the show tonight, I can only hope that she has her happy ending, whatever that may be. She really does deserve a better man, one who is as tenderhearted as she is.

  • Renee

    You need to kick him to the curb…no ifs and or buts. You are too talented and smart to waste precious time. Think long and hard and listen to your mom.

  • Jessie Campbell

    Tori, I’m sorry about your marriage, but trust is everything and he is not trustworthy…although you have 4 kids now do what is best for you and your family.

  • sarah

    Hello tori, I’m really sad for you. I hope you are well and especially children too. Be strong, be patient and listen to your heart.

  • Sightation

    Having been there & knowing I loved my husband I had to accept it wasn’t me. It would be easier if it were about me then I could control it. Can’t. I suggest that if he isn’t a serial philanderer you consider going the distance with him. I’m in my 50’s now & enjoying grandkids, our history together & growing old puts that short lived incident in it’s proper perspective. Not to minimize how painful it was. For the kids, I suggest getting a Pro to show you how to speak with them & encourage them to speak about this (age appropriate), so they don’t start a pattern of stuffing THEIR pain. It’s so important to recognize how this could mess them up as they are already FEELING all of it just like you. Lastly, if he’s willing & you are willing then he better be ready for a few years of rebuilding your trust. That’s his burden to bear. It will take time. It is so worth it though. Good luck to all.

  • Mandey

    You are a beautiful woman inside and out. Crazy to believe but things happen for a reason. Wish we could all know the reasons but we don’t. One thing that helps me when my husband and I are going through ups and downs is to focus on the 90% awesome that he truly is and not the 10% bad that he does. Mistakes happen. Go with your heart, but know if you are not happy your children will sense it. Best advice my momma have me is that every yard has dog poop in it, it is just the smell that is different. Lol

  • Sightation

    Tori, if your modus operandi is to “distract” rather than “confront & talk about the truth”:
    “dad’s not here”. Then your kids will learn how to deal healthfully. Teaching distraction is the predecessor to teenagers distracting later in life w/video games or worse, drugs. Confront & feel. That’s a healthy family. <<all learned the hard way by moi.

  • Emiliano Babarah

    Oh my God, I’m so glad to tell everyone the real thing that happen to me…My name is EMILIANO BABARAH. If i refuse to share this testimony it means i am selfish to my self and to people i love so much whom might have similar problems, March 16th about something 7:23pm after taken our dinner my husband got crazy started calling a lady name Melisa I love you, i was so mad and started crying like a baby…then my husband left home for the idiot called Melisa, and never return back home then i believed when he uthen nderstand his self he will surly come back to apology, but instead he left me So i complained to my friend she told me she was having such problems in her marriage until she was introduce to DR ORIOMON who specializes in bringing back broken homes and broken marriages DR ORIOMON cast a spell for me in May 4th surprisingly my husband came home May 6th apologizing that i should forgive him that it will never happen again, i was so glad and gave the thanks to DR ORIOMON who save my marriage, if you are having similar problem you can contact him and His email address is ( you can still save your marriage if u really love your husband.


  • Sharon Coffini

    That was really hard to watch. I feel like I know you guys from watching everything you’ve done, reading all your books and following you on here. I’m so mad he did that to you….made me cry. I hope you find your way to true happiness…you really do deserve it!! Be thankful you have such great friends…they will help you through this…carry you when you need it and lift you up. You’re clearly a very strong woman, even though you may doubt that at times (we all do). You have 4 beautiful kids and hopefully you guys can make it work and be a happy family again. Best of luck to you! XO

  • Sightation

    Whether he comes home or not. It’s up to both of u to break the family cycle of addiction/addiction behaviors & not pass that on to ur kids. Addiction is: don’t talk, don’t trust, don’t feel. Recovery is: Talk, trust, feel. I want for your kids to learn that along with you and their father. It’s lacking now. You guys can BREAK the CYCLE & have a healthy family. Look @ it like a fabulous new journey, embrace it. I’m rooting for you Tori. I get you, had famous parents too, nepotism accusations too. The whole 9 yards of TV ppl kids life. But, you can give ur kids a healthy tv kids life, you have changes to make though…

  • Jennifer Enders

    I so respect you and feel for you at the same time I also have 4 kids and went through something similar it is very conflicting and everyone has an opinion but no one else is going through it I love how you are with your Kids and you are a great mom I’m sure with time you will figure out what’s best for you and yours not everyone else! Keep your head up time heals all wounds, jennifer

  • krissie

    I’m watching TrueTori for the third time right now and need to tell you how well you are handling this very tough situation. You have always struck me as being a very great mom, and I know if you take the time you need, you will make the right choice for you & your kiddos. You can raise these kids on your own if you decide that’s what is best for you. I left a cheating/abusive spouse at 21 with a 9-month-old & 23-month-old without a penny to my name and still in college. In the end, it was the best thing for all of us. I do believe it can work to stay together, though too. However, he can’t use any excuses for his behavior, not his childhood, inadequate sex, or anything. He needs to take complete and total responsibility for his actions over and over again for as long as it takes for you to believe in him again. Many of us have had a crappy childhood, but that is no excuse and neither is anything else. Because the truth of the matter is that cheating never fixes the issue and only, always, makes it worse! I know you will make the right decision; and somewhere deep inside, past the betrayal that has turned your self-confidence inside out, you know it too. You are so much stronger than you know! My thoughts and prayers are with you; and I, for one, will support you no matter your decision! Trust in yourself to know your truth, because only you can know it. Much love.

  • Mario

    I saw the show tonight and maybe Dean is a scum as many have said. But, why is there no mention of Tori having cheated on her own husband with Dean, when both she and Dean were married to other people? I’m truly not trying to be judgmental. I am sincerely wondering how people can be so mesmerized with a celebrity that they would overlook the hearts she broke along the way. Her ex and his ex already had to deal with this pain she now feels, when Tori and Dean both thought cheating was acceptable when they were both still married to other people. If anyone is being judgmental, I think it is Tori, She’s judging for exactly what she, herself did.

    Also, I don’t think airing the dirt is, or ever will be healthy for her kids.

    I think in Tori’s heart of hearts, she would agree with me if she were to be totally honest with herself.

    Sometimes, how you start is how you end. It’s all really very sad.

  • jomama1970

    Although I have not been a Tori fan in the past, I felt compelled to make a statement about the way many people have chosen to comment about this cheating situation. Regardless of the way Tori met her husband, the children do not deserve to suffer through this situation in the spotlight. These 2 people met, fell in love and end their previous marriages without carrying on with infidelity. I think she is brave to share this story.

  • pamnga

    Tori my heart breaks for you. I’ve been where you’re at now. The only exception was my children were grown when it happened to me and I didn’t have the paparazzi to deal with. The only advice I can give you is keep your eyes wide open and trust your heart. If you decide to stay there will be some rough times, but if Dean can change then I know you both can get through this and be stronger. I wish I could reach out through this text and give you a hug. Stay strong. You’re in my prayers.

  • Tracy Bovee Walters

    Dear Tori my heart just ached for you watching that show…I wanted to come over and help you get those sweet babies ready for school, put them down for naps, let you sleep in…let you have some time with your pain to grieve cause it’s proven that infedelity is just as painfull as death…know that there is a long road ahead of you and with God’s grace you can get through to the other side, the side of true happiness and the light of truth for you and your family…prayers said sweet sister!!

  • Debbi Barr

    Tori, Your honesty and raw feelings is so true to how a women feels when going through this with someone with an addicton. I sat there last night and remember feeling just like you. Your strength is amazing and know that we are rooting for you. Whatever decision you make, make it for you and your beautiful children. Most people don’t understand when we decide to stay with our husbands, but it is because we love the real person that is inside. Not the sick one that has emerged. Stay strong and know that you are loved.

  • Kim

    Karma. You should not have cheated on your husband with a cheater, who you then married. Reap what you sow.

  • MamaBird

    Stay strong Tori! Get counseling for your marriage and do your best to work things out. It seems you really love Dean and I pray you can work through this. You have four children I know you are thinking of and want what is best for them. God bless you both and thank you for sharing your sTORI last night. My husband and I watched and held each other a little tighter after watching. Every marriage is at risk. EVERY ONE! No one is immune to it. Love and prayers to you and your family.

  • moorekr3

    Kudos to you, Tori, for having the courage to show what a strong woman you are. I’ve been a fan of yours since the days of 90210. I admire the fact that you’ve handled this whole situation with grace and dignity. You may have alot of naysayers out there, but just remember that there are still many of us out there who wish nothing but the best for you and your beautiful family. Keep on keeping on, stay strong, continue to do what’s best for you and your family, and just remember… Life is cyclical… We need to go through rough times so that we can truly appreciate the good times. :)

  • Savannah

    With great sadness I warched you bare your broken heart last night. First off, so brave of you. I saw a physically weak, broken hearted, lost and scared person. The struggling with the kids, everyday mom stuff just was so overwhelming because you are dealing with Dean’s horrible choices. I want the best for you and you stand your ground and protect your kids beyond everthing else. He doesn’t matter. YOU do and your 4 precious kids. Once a cheater always a cheater. You deserve better. He’ll say anything. Find strength in your kids, your God, your friends and yourself. It’s way past time to move forward. Be strong and set a good example for your kids. Show them you don’t need an alcoholic, depressant and a liar, that damages kids. God speed and God bless you and your children. Team Tori here.

  • Jmh72

    Part of dealing with an issue ….. I mean REALLY DEALING …. With an issue is letting go of control of the situation. It take A LOT of courage to do it let alone in the public eye. I commend you for being able to do this as you will be a role model for others that need the encouragement to do the same. If you choose to ignore the problem and it reoccures it will become such an issue that it will either start to feel normal or force you to address it hence a piano falls on your head. Thank you for being REAL so that others can see that life is not always roses and chocolate, there are thorns too. Whatever happens remember you can only control your actions. What an AWESOME role model for most importantly YOUR CHILDREN…. Letting them know what happened was wrong and you deserve and command respect. I will be praying for you and your strength whrerever the pieces may fall. AWESOME JOB MOM! 😉

  • nunya biz

    What happened to freedom of speech? Too bad you don’t like the comments. what goes around comes around. Once a cheater always a cheater. she needs to stop her whining and kick the trash to the curb. Maybe she will read this stuff and wake up with her poor me act.

  • kimmy

    I have been thur the cheating husband ordeal. It is a very painful time and it will come down to you doing what is best for you and your children. Its a tough road but it will get brighter as you go! Lots of love and prayers for you!

  • Lynn

    You are strong and brave and loving. Above those things, a great Mom. Wishing you happiness.

  • Jenny Smith

    Tori, Ive been a long time follower of your shop , home décor style. (so sad you closed it, I had a shop and know the stress )
    I wish you nothing but happiness, and after watching you with your heart on your sleeve and being brave enough knowing what so many critics will say, I admire you as a woman, mother and wife. Be strong, follow your heart and stay true to what you need to be healthy and happy.

  • prima young

    Dear Tori,

    I would like to start by saying you are a strong, brilliant, superwoman! When I saw you were going to have a new show, I was thrilled. I haven’t had cable since Tori&Dean, so I have missed out on a lot of what has happened with you. I don’t read the tabloids, they are never right. Was I shocked by last nights episode. Wow. I cried when you should have been, but you held back the tears. It sucks having to live your life in the public eye, but you are nice enough to let your fans in. THANK YOU. Remember to take time for you. Your children are your life, I know how that is, but take one day for yourself, go into a locked room, and let the tears flow. You would feel so much better. You have an amazing support system, let them in, and let them help. We all know you can do it on your own, but you don’t need to. By forgiving it does not mean you are weak or forgetting, it means you are trying to move on. I live in Buffalo, NY and we have a hometown hero, Jim Kelly. Jim and his wife Jill went through some really rough times, but got through it. You can too. If you are interested, they wrote a book. Just remember you are not alone in this, all people have opinions, but yours is the only one that matters at a time like this.

  • Heike

    I just want to say I love your shows and all that you do. I have read your books and I used to watch 90210. I do hope all works out well for you and Dean and your family you are in my thoughts and prayers and I do hope you have a very happy outcome. You are a very strong person and what is meant to happen will happen for you. Bless you for being so out there with is, it must be the hardest thing to go through and you do what is best for you and your kids no matter what that may be.

  • Jamie

    I watched the show last night and with every scene, fought back tears. I will keep you and your family in my thoughts and prayers. I am hopeful that you will overcome this and move forward (with or without Dean) with the support of your family and friends. In time, you will make the best decision for your family. Hugs, Jamie

  • jrtaylor

    Have watched you for years and seen what an amazing, hands on mother you have become. Reality tv can seem so staged and unrelatable for normal people, but this interview and the look into your life now was so…REAL. I felt so incredibly hurt for you and for those four, beautiful children. Stay strong and honest to yourself, you have a always been a powerful and inspirational woman to all who follow you.

  • Charlie

    Where is your nanny Patsy? Has she abandoned you, too? If ratings go down, you could script a storyline where Dean confesses to cheating with her.

  • Erica

    If they will do it WITH you, they will do it TO you. And no one is exempt from that little life lesson.

  • Holly

    I just watched your True Tori show. I had no idea what to expect. I was blown away by your honesty and the private moments you filmed. I really believe you will help others who are going through the same thing. Sometimes you need to know you are not alone. Thank you for sharing such an intimate part of your life. You are really pulling the curtain back on the aftermath of an affair. There are no perfect relationships, I think once everyone understands that everyone will get more comfortable in their own situation.
    I laughed when you said your kids were “fed and alive” every morning, darlin’ that’s what every mother goes through.

  • ceemi

    I’ve been where you are. Although it’s devastating you can move on with him. Time will tell what is best for you. Be open listen to your head and your heart. Only you can make the decision. You have the power to determine what road you take. Be kind to yourself and take your time. There are people on your side. Love and prayers to you and your kids!!!

  • Mary O’Neil

    I can relate to your story so much! I’ve been in your shoes in the last 10 months, You feel very alone as if you are on your own! I have found so many people who have also been there and have really comforted me and helped me realize it’s not my fault, I didn’t make this happen and as much as I have tried to control his behavior over the years I no longer can! In realizing that I have been able to release the burden off my shoulders and know that it’s his problem, I will go on and care for my kids, and as much as it hurts and I still love him more then anything if he isn’t working on himself and his sobriety there is no way I can allow him to disrupt our lives! He is 8 months sober and doing really great! It’s not always perfect but there is hope, and working on myself and trying to shake the feelings that come up that it was my fault, someone will say something that brings it all back and I find myself right there again! But It takes time and faith, but you can find peace! I wish you the very best for you and your kids! I hope you find your peace! Mary O’Neil

  • Wendy Delano Stechenfinger

    i think you are making huge mistakes here first its obvious you are not going to leave him you are going to continue to let your best friend use you for his door mat. AND most importantly you are doing it on camera for all your fans to see…why?????? i have been where you are and you look pathetic right now!!! get your butt in therapy let him take care of the kids and you go away for a couple weeks and get a grip….. you can co parent without allowing him in your bed,perhaps if u get some distance you stop believing his bs….all i can say is wow. turn the camera off turn the separation on!

  • Athena Reynolds

    Your show last night brought back so many memories and feelings of my own dealings with my husband’s cheating. I found out that three years previous he had a three month affair with a good friend of mine. The heartbreak, the anger, the feelings that I had done something to cause it were all there again. I wanted leave him and be held in his arms at the same time. I was told once by someone and I can’t even remember who it was, but that marriage is hard work, divorce is easy.
    I am still married to my husband and our reconciliation led to the creation of our now three year old daughter. Our marriage is stronger and our communication is better. I feel closer to him now. Don’t give up.

  • brandi i

    Watching the show made me cry, my heart and prayers go.out to u and ur family. Ur an amazing mom and person tori, its just one more obstacle.

  • sandra

    Been there done that. It is only when you except that your marriage is over that you can rebuild your life. I too tried to make it work but living without trust is not living and of course he did it again….you can still have a wonderful relationship with the father of your children.

  • Kelly

    I watched the True Tori episode last night and feel all the pain you are experiencing. Having been in your same shoes, it is one of the most difficult and trying times you will face. You will never love him the same as you did before. You will never look at him the same either. It’s almost as if a stranger is now standing before you. I, like your friend Jess, could not accept it or move past it so I did not have a happy ending. However, there are many woman that do. Only you will know what you are capable of. I applaud you for facing this situation head-on, cameras and all. You are the epitome of grace and dignity. Wishing you and your family all the best as you continue to sort all this out.

  • Guin

    I know a lot of people don’t understand why she would televise this but I get it. I might not want to do it myself but people deal with things differently. I knew a woman once whose husband maxed out all of their credit cards and didn’t pay their mortgage so their house was foreclosed on. She told everyone exactly what happened. Why? Because everyone would be gossiping and speculating anyway so she felt like she could lessen that a little by getting the truth out there. Again, you don’t have to agree with this approach but it does make some sort of sense…

  • Siobhan

    Just watched the show, and just had to share it happened to me after 6 years of marriage, just wanted to say HANG IN THERE AND CONTINUE TO GIVE IT ALL YOU’VE GOT TO GIVE and IN the end IF it still doesn’t work then at least you can look God in the face & Your self in the mirror and say I tried I gave it all I had to give…….Wish You All The Best..

  • conjured_1

    Tori – Thank you for sharing your story. There were many times last night that mirrored my experiences with a sex addicted spouse. So much so that I came to the realization that SAs have a script. It’s an addiction script, but it’s so damaging to their partners. Sex addiction, unless you’ve been there (my husband is the SA, we were in counseling – per person and couple – for six years), people, friends, family, aren’t going to understand. Take the time for you. Find out why you’ve accepted the role of co-addict (for me it was child abuse, and my own addictions – anorexia, meth), and get healthy. Let Dean continue his journey in recovery (if that’s in his life story). None of this is easy.

  • Kim

    I heard someone say once that it was easier to forgive their childrens father then to forgive her husband. Just a different way to look at it and the others who are effected. No one is living in your shoes, we all hope that you and your family will get through this. You are such a strong person.

  • Tamara Hobson

    Hang in there Tori! I think its brave and courageous of you to put this all out there. You will come through this trial a stronger woman. Don’t forget to use all your help and take time for you. Hugs to you

  • Tami

    Hang in there Tori! It is brave and courageous of you to put this all out there. It will help your healing and get you through this hard time. Praying for you and sending you hugs.

  • steph

    Tori – I just finished watching episode one. I so completely get your feelings towards Dean, and how you think some of your feelings are wrong or judged. Please know that there are other women out there, married to deeply flawed, yet good, men, who in their gut know that this man is the love of her life, despite other people suggesting otherwise. Reconciling his actions, his hurts, his misdeeds with the person you know to your core is someone that you are supposed to be with is a difficult, difficult thing to do. And knowing that deep down, this flawed man is a good, good soul who at the end of the day wants nothing more than to be good to you and your kids. It’s HARD trying to live with and accept what he has done and being able to forgive and, perhaps, most challenging of all is to be happy moving forward. I completely get where you are coming from as a mom. When I have been hurt or disappointed by my husband, what keeps me moving forward is my commitment to my kids. In those times, I’m not exactly the perfect mom, but I’m mom, and more often than not, that’s just fine.

  • B

    Just a thought from another point of view. As the single father of ten children, I can only say that things are not easy. A person must find the strength within themselves and simply do what must be done. I, myself have faced a similar circumstance, and I guess that is why I reach out now. I did it and regardless of the decisions you will uncertainly have to make, you will do it as well. Simply, my advice is this. To not make your decisions in haste. Listen to those closest to you, however don’t let their advise push you to a decision that you don’t wish to make. It is a fine balance you must find, but YOU must find it. You are the one that has to live with those decisions, no matter what they will be.

  • hayley

    Tori, I admire the books you have read and your commitment as a mom to your family but wouldnt it be better to move on with your life with your kids alone. Maybe you could reconnect with your mom and brother and form a stronger family bond with them. It isnt just the fling or addiction that your husband did to your marriage, it is that fact that he doesnt seem remorseful or is happy in the marriage with you. If he was, his actions and comments would not appear they way they do. Sometimes you have to know when to fold em and know when to walk away. You are a strong woman and will recover. Good luck

  • Julia

    I couldn’t wait on my DVR, thus had to watch your show at its time. I was in tears with you last night. It is so trite to say this, but my husband also cheated. There are so many variables that make each spouse’s story different, but the feelings are the same. You’re getting so much advice so I hesitate, but it’s so important so I am going to share it: (1) surround yourself with people who want you to make it and (2) go on a secular music fast. Number 1 is important because it makes a great difference if your marriage will make it. For example, my sister was like your friend and upset–wanting me to leave my husband. A good friend of mine was supportive and encouraging–giving me great advice on handling the situation with the aim of staying together. I firmly believe that if I lived near my sister and continually got her advice I would be divorced from my husband. Number 2 is important because the secular music world is toxic to healing: “Broken Vow” by Josh Groban, “Unfaithful” by Rihanna, “Before He Cheats” by Carrie Underwood–and the list goes on. You will stay in a state of victim or it will make you feel superior–both don’t allow healing. Personally, for 30 days I listened to nothing but Christian music (think Toby Mac, The City Harmonic, Tenth Avenue North, etc.) and it brought me/my focus outside myself. Very surreal to be sharing my thoughts with you. Prayers for you and your sweet family…

  • Tanya

    Tori, I watched the episode last night and my heart breaks for you and your children. I don’t know if trust can be regained after its lost or if you would really want to spend your life always afraid of catching him another lie. The energy you would expend on always verifying what he says or if he is where he says he is, is going to wear you out and that energy could be spent on raising your children. You have a tough choice to make, but please make sure you take care of yourself first, because if you don’t, who is going to take care of you?

  • Megan

    The secret to a successful marriage is forgiveness. If you’re in a lifelong relationship with someone (friends, family, love), they WILL hurt you sometimes. The mistake I made when this happened to me is feeling as though I couldn’t forgive him because he needed to be punished. I needed to show the world that NOBODY could cheat on me. That marriage ended, and now that I’m older and have more experience, I realize that I don’t care what other people think about what I’m doing. Relationships are not cut and dry. They are so very complicated. So I say fight for your marriage. Fight! It’s ok to forgive him for what he’s done and re-establish a connection. You are not betraying yourself (or anyone else) by doing so. It’s unfortunate that your situation has to play out in the media, but millions are going through this now or will in the future, and your heartbreak could be their hope that they can get through it.

  • Amber Harris

    Tori, I am a big fan of you and your family, I loved your shows and have all your books and love them. I want to reach out and express to you how sorry I am to hear how hard things have become for you and your family. I am a big cheerleader for love and although I disagree with Dean’s choice, I think you two can work things out and make things better. I believe in forgiveness if the person is truly sorry and makes real changes to be better. I hope you find strangth in the positive things people are saying and can ignore any negative. Good luck to you and your family and continue to stay strong and be the amazing mom and person that you are.

  • Krystal

    To be honest…. Totally understood as I have been in your situation before however Tori did you ever think about you cheating on Deans wife when you slept with him? I’m guessing she felt the same and was just as hurt as you so it’s hard for me to fell really sorry for a woman who did just a hurtful thing to someone else. Karma has a way of paying back. Hopefully you will move forward and do what’s best for your children!

  • Katie

    I didn’t see the story yet, but I think you are an exceptional, strong, loving person and God will help you through this. Sending you love and hugs.

  • Summer Oreskovich

    I have watched you grow into a beautiful women. But now its time for you to do what is best for you and your kids. You are a strong women and you are blessed with so many people in your life.Everyone deserves to be happy and loved. Your heart has to do whats is right. And only you well choose what is best for your family. Prayers for you and the kids…

  • Heather

    Tori, just want to say I am praying for you and your family as you go through this difficult time. My heart is breaking for you all. I really wish you the best.

  • Poshtots

    You have such strength and it showed last night. Every talk show said how strong you are and how much everyone has a new respect for you! It will never be the same. You will never have the Dean you hoped he would be. He saw you on your death bed carrying his baby and then went out a year later and cheats on you? That’s not love and he will never change. He doesn’t deserve you. Please move on and do what is best for you. Dean is a pig and he was awful last night… Disgusting!

  • Sameshoes

    March 31st 2013 9:15pm was when I discovered in my marriage what you recently discovered. It’s not a “Welcome to the Club” that I would wish on anybody. You could see how much in shock you still were in the first episode and I could so relate to that feeling of not knowing what the fuck is going on in my head, heart and everywhere else in my body. I was numb for months before I decided to work on me. My husband worked on himself.

    I just told him “you are watching Tori Spelling’s new show with me because you need to be reminded of what it looks like and you can see it when you watch her and she’s not acting!” I just watched it on the computer but recorded it on the TV so tomorrow night we will be watching it together to further our discussions on our own marriage. I know that when my husband see’s Dean he’s going to connect with him so much. For me it was like looking at my husband, except he’s yours! I am rooting for both of you individually to get as healthy as possible. AND ONLY THEN is there a chance for your marriage to survive this. Thank God you have some great friends for support, they were my lifeline too! I hope you are reading “Codependent No More” by Melody Beattie?

  • Tara

    This show I believe was the best decision to tell your side of things. After watching last night, I have a few things I want to say. First and foremost youre an absolutely amazing mother. It’s hard raising kids, and alone at that. It’s hard not feeling like your good enough for your own husband. I’ve been just where you are and it has to be the most heartbreaking situation to ever go through. I wish you the best. Just remember this : You have to go through the bad days, so you can appriciate the good days, and trust me there will be many more good days ahead for you.

  • Daleisher

    Trust your heart. If you picture a better, less stressful and fulfilling life for you and your children, move on one step at a time. That show broke my heart. Why don’t you have a nanny, a housekeeper, you deserve MORE!!!! You will love again, you will get over this most difficult time. With love and strength, Deborah

  • mimiredhead

    Tori, I am sad for you. You have given Dean (4) lovely children and now he chooses to be unfaithful. Sometimes we have to respect ourselves enough to walk away. What kind of life will it be not trusting your husband? I am sure it will be exhausting to say the least and quite honestly your time could be better spent building a life for your children and yourself. You cannot fix what is wrong with Dean. He must seek out help both professional and spiritual because there is a spirit driving him to live out this behavior. I have been married for thirty years and marriage is lots of work which I am sure is no revelation to you. I have soon to be six grandchildren. I was shocked to hear that he was critical of your private intimate life…stunning! Do not take Dean’s problems as your own because he must deal with his own issues as an individual, father and maybe a husband. You do not want your children to see you as a weak, emotionally dependent woman whose happiness is
    found only in a man who does not respect her. You want them to see you as a strong woman willing to step up and make a very hard decision. You are now in charge, he has lost the right to call any shots in your life. I am a Christian wife, Mother and Grandmother and I would never advise one of my children or their spouse to stay in a situation such as this. I hope that Dean will get the necessary help but remember you cannot fix him…that HE alone must do with God’s help!

  • Rhonda Longosky

    Tori, You are so brave to put all this out in the world. I had been married for 10 years when I got the shock of my life. My husband had been lieing to me our entire marriage and had to go into treatment to figure some things out. I was so embarrassed I didn’t want anybody to know and here you are sharing with the world. I want you to know that we have been married 21 years now and i’m so grateful that I stuck it out and fought for my marriage. He is a completely different man now. It was really hard and took a lot of work on both of our parts. I had to change also. Remember your vows and the promise to stay through bad times. Be the better person and don’t just walk away. Earn your way out. Be able to say you did everything possible to save your marriage and you will be blessed with a new life with your husband or feel good about moving on. I know you don’t know me but, i’m rooting for you. I will pray for you and watch your show to see what happens. Hang in there and be brave for the little ones.

  • Survivor

    You deserve better. I am a two time cancer survivor and you need to fight for your life and kid’s lives. He has issues with lying and this is a major character flaw you can’t change. Once a liar, always a liar.

  • Tracy Baker

    Tori – You ARE Amazing!! I watched the show as I have watched all your shows from way back and read all your books. Things are tough right now but you will come through this strong (as you always do) regardless of what the two of you work out as the outcome.

    My advice if I was your friend…
    I support your family no matter your decision!!

    Do what makes you feel good and happy even if other outsiders may not like it. It may be time for a Scary New Normal regardless if that includes Dean or not. One thing is for sure… THINGS WILL CHANGE.

    Trust your instinct, don’t regret anything, the children need happy well adjusted parents whether that means together or co-parenting apart. Treat YOURSELF the way you would want your children (daughters and sons) to be treated if in this situation. Take care of you!!! Smile, even if you have to keep telling yourself to do it. The children will see it. If you fill and refill your cup in this trying time it will overflow onto the children and make it easier for all of you. Don’t worry about being selfish in this situation. Seems like it may be time for that.

    Tracy-42-Divorced Mother of 3 Sons

  • Misty

    Prayers and positive thoughts sent your way we are all behind you!

  • Marilyn

    Strange how the negative comments seem to disappear.

  • Michelle

    Was it really necessary to make a documentary with your kids? You could have done a nice sit down with people and not subjected your kids to this. In a way that people are saying is true… you sold your dirty laundry! You should take your profits and feed a 3rd world country. This is pretty low. Even though your husband cheated you have to move on.. either accept his mistakes or be done with him. Do you know how many people are cheated on?!?!?!? Its kind of lame that you cant even get your kids to school on time…. Stop using your husbands infidelity and get it together!

  • MelissaK

    Watching your show is almost like looking in a mirror. I can feel your pain… I’ve been in your shoes. I’m so sorry you and your family are facing this struggle.

    My babies are the reason I got out of bed every morning during those first horrible months. I’m not sure where I would be today without them. I know how hard it is to be looking after the kids when you can barely look after yourself, but you are doing an amazing job.

    We are still taking things day by day but I can honestly say I have more good days than bad now. I’m happy again thanks to a lot of work and time. I think we can and will come out of this with a healthier marriage.

    Tori you are stronger than you realize. Thank you so much for sharing your story.

  • Alison

    Namaste Tori, to you and yours and all that is around you. You will weather this storm. You are strong and hold within you all of the gifts that you need to make it to the other side. I have been in your shoes and the pain and self-doubt are a part of the difficulty, but accept support and look inward, you will prevail. I believe you are a wonderful person and the love that you have for your family will bring you great strength. Anyone with eyes and a heart can easily see that wealth and celebrity to not shield you from pain and upset, if only….

  • Can’t change a man

    Dean had an affair with Tori while they were both married when they first got together. Leopards do not change their spots. What made her think she could change him from the pattern he had already established?

  • Karen

    Tori, you and Dean should watch Kirk Cameron’s Love Worth Fighting For Marriage event…it changed my marriage. My inlaws have both now expressed sadness that they divorced long ago over cheating. They see that life would be much more fulfilling if they had stuck thru the hard times instead of choosing another spouse only to fail again. Marriage is so much work but the beautiful rewards are worth the hard times. You will be stronger and better as a couple if you can forgive each day. The fairy tale is the good and the bad. History together means alot. And your children’s lives will be so enriched if they see that you both come together and fight thru the hard times. I will keep your family in my prayers. Godspeed.

  • Sarahlena

    My suggestion to you is do not read the comments! 😉 But if you do here is what I think – You are a great mom and your kids seem to be doing just fine. Most families go through hard times and kids survive – just keep loving them as you so obviously do. I can completely understand wanting to tell your own story when your whole life has been in the media. Keep your chin up and know that all mom’s and dad’s make mistakes and are not perfect – just take a deep breath every day and do the best that you can. No matter what you do good or bad someone is going to have something negative to say – don’t let that into your life or your head just keep being you! Lots of love to you and your family!

  • Nancy

    Hi Tori. I just watched your show over the weekend and it really affected me. I found myself crying through most of it and totally identifying with all of your feelings. My husband was also unfaithful to me. Luckily, we did not have any children. I couldn’t believe he would do that and I was sad, angry, hurt and confused just like you. No one around me knew- we didn’t tell anyone. I felt very alone and could only find comfort from complete strangers online who also had been through the same experience. Just know you will get better no matter if you guys work through it or need to stay apart. My husband and I went to therapy and have a better understanding and are able to communicate. I think in the end, the affair saved our marriage. We probably would have divorced by now if we didn’t work through other issues that both of us had to work on within ourselves. Your worst fear happened. Now there is nothing to be scared of- there is just going forward.
    Love to you and your adorable kids

  • Christi Harris

    Tori, I am so sorry for what you are going through. I have been through a similiar situation. My husband and I have 4 children and had been married 19 years when he cheated on me. I was devestated, in shock, in denial. He was my rock, my knight is shining armor, my best friend. I trusted him. I believed in him, I wanted and thought I would be the only one for him. It has been 17 months and I still haven’t fully processed it. How can you process something like this? I had always said that I would never stay with anyone who has cheated on me. But I have loved this man for so long. I didn’t know what to do. My husband also went away for months to get some mental health treatment afterwards. I too was excited to see him but I felt ashamed and weak for wanting to see him. Everyone was telling me to leave him. I felt like I did something wrong that made him cheat. I don’t know how to get the trust back. My life with him will never be the same. I will never feel completely safe with him ever again. Why did he do this not only to me but our family? Why did he take away our fairytale? What could I have done different. Watching your first episode of True Tori I broke down like I haven’t been able to since this whole thing happened. I have felt more alone then I ever have in my whole life. I felt for the first time like someone else completely understands. It made me so sad to see the pain in your eyes. I know that pain. I am not a celebrity, not pretty but I related with you so much. I am so sorry Tori, I wish I had the answers. Hang in there, love up your kiddos every chance you get. They give you so much strength.


  • It gets better

    Tori, your girlfriends from the first episode are so predictable. “Dump him”, easy to say when it’s not u and you’re one of “those”girls. I was in your shoes once, I did not dump him, I kept my family together and have no regrets. People make mistakes, we are human. The love between you and dean is evident. With this behind you, you will both be able to focus on your future, no more wondering when “Deano” will appear. “Deano” learned a hard lesson, and who wants to repeat that? P.s. It takes time, but the day will come when you aren’t thinking about this every moment of every day. I know.

  • Bernie

    Praying for you. :)

  • Debbie

    No one really understands the pain that you feel inside when someone you love with all your heart betrays your trust. Its not like a milkshake that you can send back because they didn’t get the order right. This is something you will always carry with you. If you really love him, then your marriage is worth fighting for. He needs to work on earning and winning back your trust and then and only then will you be able to focus on working on your marriage. If you don’t trust him you can’t focus on what needs to be worked on. Take one day at a time. Your such a beautiful person. This is HIS problem, and he has to own it, not by words but by his actions but unfortunately the ripples affect everyone around him. Its not going to be easy. His remarks about how good sex was…his excuse to wander. Perhaps it wasn’t whether the sex was fantastic enough but perhaps subconsciously he felt the grass was greener on the other side and look at all he has been missing out on and this was what he needed to justify his choice to cheat. You are an incredible person, don’t stop believing in yourself.

  • Debby

    Tori, for what it’s worth, I think you and Dean are two of the most courageous people in this country. What you are doing can only bring you both healing, regardless of whether you stay together or not. Do not worry about your children: Your honesty is what they will know and remember. They will be fine!

  • eva scharfe

    Dean is kinda creepy, and I don’t believe his suicide thoughts were anything but a way to get sympathy. Tori loves him and has beautiful kids, and my advice would be to go back with him if that’s what she wants. I do think hovever, that he might do it again and Tori should probably not think so much about Dean and do whatever makes her happy.

  • Debby

    Tori, give it time…give it all time.

  • Michelle

    Tori, just know that the feelings you are having are competely normal. I too had a husband who cheated on me, and told me that the reaons he did was because I wasn’t sexy anymore. I went through years of this and finally found my voice and decided to leave. The feelings you address on True Tori are the same feelings I had. The difference is that Dean went and got help, and that he is with you going through marriage counceling. I didnt have that. God Bless your family and remain strong!

  • Been there

    Dear Tori, when I was a young mother, 22 to be exact, with my first son, my husband cheated on me. I didn’t find out until at least 20 years later. It hit me like someone threw a rock at me! My husband had a nervous breakdown and decided that was the right time to tell me….It took me 16 years to even come to grip with it all. We had many discussions and fights but February of this year, I finally forgave him. After he told me we did go on with life as usual because by that time we had 4 sons. It is very difficult to deal with especially if you have low self esteem as I did. I pray for the healing of your marriage. I want you to know that it is not your fault, it is his. He had a choice and made the wrong one. Do not feel sorry for him, he did it and has to own up to it!! I think it is good that he moved back in but make sure you have your space to come to grips with this, if you ever can. If you can’t you gave it a good try and never be ashamed of anything you decide. I stayed with my husband because he is a good husband, besides that, father, friend and boss…..You have a very hard decision to make and don’t make it for any reason but the right one for you. God bless you and I pray you find peace. Marie

  • Missmommy

    I will say this…
    As a mother of 5 children who has been married to a man that cheated on me more than once (i forgave & worked through it with him-not without issues though, years of hard work on BOTH sides) we are still married & have been together 16 yrs. It CAN work as long as you BOTH love each other. We got through it but under the very hurtful scrutiny of family because to much outside family members became emotionally involved w/out knowing all the details & thats what almost tore us apart.
    I am not sure i agree with your decision to publicly open up your home like this w/four young kids involved. I get that you would like to ” set the record straight” on who you are & what has happened but you owe that to no one. Not one person..
    Once you give birth it should be all about protecting your children & they will never be able to put this behind them due to the nationaly publicized event it has become. No longer can you say its just news & photogs making things up. They can now witness things out of their own mother & fathers mouth that they should not have to unless they as the deciding adult (much later in life) chose to sit you down and ask you.
    Just my opinion. Im saying this from a loving place as a mother knowing how hard it was on our kids with just family scrutiny..
    It is ultimately your decision & wish you & kiddos all the best.
    We will pray for you all!

  • Sightation

    When I was a child and my parents forced me before cameras to ride my horse, smile, etc. it made me feel very angry because once the shoot was done I was instructed to go away and play. I was raised by t v people as well, both parents. The scene on “Real Tori” at the piñata store Liam actually said: “I feel angry at you”. That could have been an opportunity to address what he so courageously communicated to you but instead you made it all about you and told him that he was making you feel bad by feeling angry. If these kids don’t learn that it is safe to openly express their feelings they’ll shut down like you are now. Of course you can’t be perfect but I feel it is so important to LISTEN to and then mirror back all of your children’s feelings. You could have simply said: “Your feeling angry. Okay, what’s up, talk to me,” Then he would’ve repeated that he “felt that you were choosing everything, not him.” You then would’ve walked him through the process & he’d come out the other side feeling seen, heard and his feelings honored. A lack of that only teaches kids that they don’t exist on a feeling level and worse, that taking care of your feelings is the priority. I’m guessing that you were raised in a “Don’t Talk; Don’t Trust, Don’t Feel” family. You and Dean can break that cycle of dysfunction by using every opportunity to slowly learn that all of you must Talk, Trust and Feel. Especially giving that gift to your kids. Break the cycle!! I know you can Tori and I feel I know you from being a kid of T V people. P.S. If you ever need a real friend with no agenda (besides the kids!), I am here for you. God bless you on this sacred journey ahead of you. At least try to listen to what they feel and mirror it back to them i e “I’m wondering if you are feeling frustrated right now?”. I think you will be amazed when their eyes lock into yours and you connect on a whole new level.

  • Bea Long

    When a person is unhappy in their relationship for whatever, there is no salvaging it. That is all that matters. This has to be Tori’s truth and only she knows what that is.

  • Lesley

    Dear Tori, I am in awe of you! You are incredible for being so vulnerable and sharing your story and every step of your journey. I have watched all of your reality shows and read a couple of your books. You are an inspiration .. because of your authenticity and vulnerability. That makes you strong … “That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.” 2 Corinthians 12:10. I am a Mom of a 4 and 2 year old and have been married 6 years. I am the last of 6 kids and never had a voice until this year. I have had an incredible Mentor who has coached me into a relationship with God.. in which I have learned unconditional love for myself and forgiveness and I have choices. I don’t know what it is like to go through what you are going through.. but my husband cheated on me before we were married.. and I, eventually, chose to forgive him.. and I am so happy I did. I pray, that you and Dean can work this out and come out eventually stronger in your relationship! Remember when all your babies where born.. how much did you value and love them that day? A Ton! What did they do to earn that love? Nothing… That same love exists for you and Dean.. and you don’t have to earn it! There is Freedom there .. the sacrifice Jesus made for us covers all sin! You both are the answers to many peoples prayers just for being who you.. and I thank you!

  • Tara

    Tori you and dean and those beautiful babies deserve the chance to heal and be restored beyond the damage this has created! I believe it’s Gods best for your marriage to be restored and your family be whole. There is no doubt about the real love between you and dean! Your marriage can recover from this! Love your beautiful family praying for you!

    • Guest

      Why do you believe “it’s God’s best” for their marriage to be restored?! Their marriage started because they BOTH CHOSE to break God’s commandments. They BOTH CHOSE to disregard the holy matrimonial vows that they BOTH CHOSE to stand before God and promise to honor. And why is there “no doubt about the real love”?! tori has said multiple times that she will manipulate and lie about any product or storyline she is trying to sell and promote. This marriage has been a product AND a storyline from day one so there is major doubt as to what is real. Maybe this marriage SHOULDN’T recover from this because what begins in lies and manipulation should end in lies and manipulation.

  • LaDonna

    Wishing you peace and most of all love. Hugs to your little ones too. Take care of you and prayers to your husband for the enlightenment he so desperately needs. Much love from the Gilmores.

  • Dana

    I’m very upset that with Liams B -day party you are saying he really needs you and This is the same age as his !st son was when he left him and his Mother No one cared about that childs Feelings !

  • Kelly

    Tori, so brave of you to speak publicly on the details of Dean’s betrayal and so helpful for those of us who have and are going through it too. I can identify with so many of your circumstances, feelings and thoughts. Certainly no easy decision especially when 4 small children are involved. I’m thankful that you have the support of your close friends. My heart is with you.

  • bingo35

    I so get your reasons for wanting to tell your own story but watching u last night, I wanted to grab u and say honey, don’t do this to yourself. I was humiliated for you. I never cared for Dean as I felt he was using you and not respectful. You work ur arse off & appear to be the sole breadwinner, yet he is constantly thinking of what HE wants- witness the drag racing when u asked him pls don’t do it. I cried for u, b/c I was once in somewhat similar shoes as u. Dean was all about Dean last night as usual. He was being his usual manipulative self with the pity party and he knew which buttons to push in you to get u on board with the pity party. The asshat cheated on you. End of story. It was not you or anything you did. He made the choice and he should be on his hands & knees begging for forgiveness. Instead he is so narcissistic, he makes it a pity party with the bs suicide b/c he knew how you would react. Bingo, gets who gets to come home? I know the kids missed their daddy and u want that for them. But never should it be at the expense of yourself. Children are remarkably resilient as long as they know their boundaries. You & Dean can’t hide ur problems from the kids, they will know. There is no reason for them to know the details but they can sense something is wrong. Their stability should come first. Dean could have rented a house close by and the kids would know they can see daddy on x days and Mommy on y days. They adjust and surprisingly well. (Maybe the adults should take a hint from the kids!) Dean plays on ur weaknesses and knows them too well. This situation can only HAVE A CHANCE of a happy ending if you come from a position of strength not weakness. You allow him back in the home b4 you have even processed and know exactly what you are feeling and what YOU want, is not good. Trust me, I’ve been there. I’ve been a Team Tori for a long time. Your creativity is just awesome b/c I am hopeless in that area. I love your quirkiness b/c it is soooo me. You are a very resourceful woman and far stronger than you give yourself credit for or recognize in urself. You can come out of this stronger and trust me, your sun WILL shine again (even if it is with another dude), but now is the time for some inner Tori time. Otherwise I’m going to come over (u don’t live far from me)and kick ur arse. Just kidding, I’ll have one of the guncles do it. I know it doesn’t matter what anyone says to you; at the end of the day you’re going to do what you are going to do. I just hope b4 u make that leap, you will realize and internalize you are worth better than this. xx

  • Chris

    Thanks for sharing your story. I am pulling for you guys! You are a beautiful, loving family and you deserve much happiness!

  • ebmom123

    Love you Tori! Seriously, I feel like you’re my long lost little sister. Hang in there my sweet. Give your little ones long hugs, it will help. Wish I could come over and give you a hug. Much love to you! ❤️❤️❤️

  • leslie

    painful, but the truth is that sexual addiction/ocd is very real and chemical… give the guy some Prozac and let him heal… and you will see that it isn’t about his lack of love… things can get better truly

  • Y

    Tori, I feels the pain you are encountering. Just watched your second epi and as a woman who has beed there done that…. I am simply on your side. I will be your TORInator here to support you!

  • WisconsinMom

    Hang in there, Tori. I wish you and your family only the best!

  • bai970

    Dean is manipulative. He’s playing you. As soon as the questions get too tough, he breaks down. He turns this to be all about him. Its abusive.

  • Keri

    Umm. Really? I’ve never commented on anything. But I am married and I have a child and I have been cheated on. I’ve never been a cheater so first let me say karma tori. Second you need help. Serious help. U obviously have no confidence in yourself or any sense of self worth. Not to mention the parenting classes u need for exposing ur children to a lifetime of therapy. Stop. Take a moment think about the daughters WOMEN you are raising and what effect ur weak walk all over me attitude is teaching them. And dump the useless man who is setting a bad wxple for what kind of men u want ur sons to be and what type of Man U want ur daughters to marry. Show them now that a broken family can be a healthy family. That u can still be a team at raising and loving and protecting and providing for them. Stop with te reality shit. Ur only hurting u children. And remember it’s better to be from a broken family than in a broken family. Get strong and be a good role model.

  • Marie Ella


  • Toni

    I’m sorry you’re going through a difficult time. I love all of your shows-I just wish this show was under better circumstances.

  • MC

    Watching you talk about where you are and how you feel is a mirror image for me; human nature is a funny thing, we are really all the same. Gosh I can so relate to all you feel about the hurt the betrayal and being able to freely tell your husband how you feel without sending them into a downward spiral. The walls we build around us to protect us are very hard to tear down, built from anger, betrayal and hurt and the ability not to trust. It is difficult to be the one who is betrayed, it’s almost as though the tables been turned and you(we) are the ones who are now responsible for the happily ever after, if we are unable to forgive. So do we just carry on? It’s a heavy burden to bare, this I know. Thank you for sharing so openly and honestly.

  • Hedge

    Tori – I have adored you since 90210 days and heard this week about True Tori this week – DVRed and am watching it for the second time today….My husband and I are rolling on three months of separation for infidelity and going through the motions of marriage and focusing only on the kids and careers. We are going to counseling and things are on the right path – we love each other dearly but need to reconnect as a couple. Thank you for sharing this story – those of us that have walked in these steps know exactly how this feels.

  • Keri

    Tori find strength in yourself. Your children. Let dean go and prove he can be a real man if u could see urself frim the outside u are making girls look weak.

  • Alex.

    hang in there , Love you Tori

  • WifeofanAddict

    I usually don’t watch reality TV but while flipping thru the channels I came upon the episode where Dean is discussing his insatiable desire for sex and the counselor says that is also an addiction…while the episode did not touch on this further…I would say the counselor is right on…as a wife of a sex addict I recognize all the signs in Dean (my husband and I counsel and lead sexual addiction groups in our community)…and Tori…I feel your pain…been there. TORI – get help through your counselor to understand addiction and educate yourself as much as you can as that is how YOU WILL recover. While you may not be an addict you are married to an addict – you and your family must learn to live with it. Addiction whether it is drugs, alcohol or sex is NEVER cured but the hope lies in being in a recovery program. Dean will always be an addict – it is like having an 800 lb gorilla in you marriage for the rest your life…trust for you will grow as he develops and maintains a committed recovery program…there are SA groups and groups for spouse of addicts…join them (note: you can’t film the meetings as they are confidential but you will benefit from them immensely),,,you will learn to set boundaries and realistic consequences if those boundaries are violated, to recognize his triggers, to communicate to your children age appropriately (it is not only you living with Dean’s addiction but them as well)…working a recovery program for you empowers you – helps you gain control and…I CAN’T EMPHASIZE enough that Dean needs to stay in an addiction recovery program…you need to make it one of your requirements for him staying in the house…this is a boundary…one of the most helpful boundaries that I set for myself and my husband was requiring him to take a lie detector test every 3 months for a year….such accountability help him break the cycle of addiction….and it allowed me to start trusting him husband is a good man but he is an addict and will always be an addict the difference is he is RECOVERING addict…going on 15 years! Finally, sex addiction is an insidious addiction because it is so well hidden but as in any addiction it escalates as the addict needs more and more…that is it spirals out of control through an affair, or abuse, or an illegal act….TORI you could do so much good by HIGHLIGHTING THIS ADDICTION AND WHAT WOMEN/MEN/FAMILIES CAN DO ABOUT IT through your show…again, I encourage you to seek help. Best of luck!

  • Jo

    I watched another episode of True Tori last night and I cried for you again the whole time. I’m glad to see you turning the tables on the media and coming out with your story. It makes “the other women’s” grab for media attention insignificant.

    Your power animal is a bear. You are shy, insecure and appear timid (most actors are). Bears walk through life placidly and appear docile, slowly walking around eating berries and grubs until someone messes with their cubs then WHAM they’ve taken your head off. I saw that in you in the first episode when your child was sick and the photographer tried to take a photo. You are stronger than you realize.

    As far as Dean is concerned Dean is a putz, but he’s your putz and if you are determined to save your marriage I hope it works out for you. He doesn’t deserve you. I would have hired a nanny to help with the kids and moved on. You’re a great Mom don’t ever let anyone say different.

    Dean was right when he said people noticed him when he got together with you. I didn’t even know who he was until you did your Tori and Dean series. Your fans love you and embraced him as well.

    Stay in therapy even if Dean doesn’t, it will help you work on your issues so you can move on whether it is with him or alone. Trust your instincts.

    Know that people love you and support you in whatever you decide. I’m sending you a cyber hug!

    • Guest

      “Your power animal is a bear”. Well. okie dokie then! Lookie….there goes a unicorn!

  • Pam P

    I just want you to know how touched I am by our candidness about what is going on with you. Some people say you should not air out your laundry on TV.. I disagree. What you are doing for women across America is a beautiful thing. So many go through what you have. They can draw strength from you. You are such a level headed person. You have such a sweet gentle is so beautiful. You are so great with your kids. Its such a sweet thing to see how you talk to them, reason with them, love them….
    Last night’s episode was so difficult for me to watch, because I felt Dean kept turning everything back around to himself, and not you. It was hurtful to see. But, he is a man, he sees things Dean’s is his nature. When you confront him..she starts acting upset, shutting you down and blocking your expression by manipulating it towards him. This is my opinion sweetie, just outside looking in. But you are not being allowed to express yourself for him throwing up his hands and acting like he is all stressed out.. Again, not letting you deal with your side and confront him. He HAS to hear those things and has to let you have your say. This,” Im fragile” bull, is starting to bother me. Like him wanting to sleep in HIS own bed..knowing you clearly are not ready for that… Making it about him and not recognizing the hurt you feel to your core. When you showed him the picture of you and the kids at Christmas and he started getting “upset”. If hurt me so deeply for you, because he again turned it around on himself to stop you… He has to deal with what he has done and feel the pain the way you feel it. Like I say, this is just my opinion..but I tears me up to see you hurt and not get to deal with it. I know he is dealing with things..but I truly think allot of what he is “dealing ” with is a cop out maneuver to cover his butt because he got caught and is in the public eye. I know he loves you, but he has to let you work through this and really be there for you, like you are for him. I also think you need you some good hug therapy. I think you need to start hugging more, with friends. kids, etc. You need to feel warmth around, love wrapped around you:). My mother didn’t hug me allot…I was abused emotionally and physically. My daddy dad affairs and left us when we were small so I know what you feel and how your kids will feel… I am 52 now..and I need hugs now…I do not get many, and I need them…sweetie…you need hugs…give your kids lots of them..lots of kisses….
    Again, thanks for your show.. I have a great deal of respect for you…..:) Hang in there!!!!!

    • Guest

      Apparently you missed the interview tori and her producers did about 2 weeks ago where they decided to keep the main focus on dean and the affair. tori was afraid the viewers would stop watching the show if it started focusing too much on her, and why she is taking major opiate pain medications, and her poor health. the basics of it was that the more dean looks like an asshat, the better the ratings are so they are going to make him look at shitty as possible.

  • Shari

    I love & support you Tori. Having said that, you need to either forgive Dean or let him go. Get the kiddies out of the Big Bed & get your relationship back on track.

  • Karen

    Tori I watched the show and some parts I was in shock of and other parts I thought whoa that is a stupid thing to say or do. Tori your a grown woman and you know what you need to do and that is take care of yourself and your children. Dean did wrong big time. He admits that. He is scared of losing you and the kids (not the money). He knows what he did and why he did it. He does have a problem no doubt about it. You to have a problem you won’t speak up and say things when its going on.

    You bottle it up and then when you need to open up and speak up for yourself you won’t. He is a victim your a victim its those kids. They have two parents they love and their whole world is about to crash around their heads. Still not a reason to stay in a marriage that is broken and can not be repaired.

    Tori you can’t stay for the kids I’ll tell you that right now. You will become bitter and resentful; they will see it and feel it. Example; you taking a swipe at Deans cooking. There was no sense in what you said and he told you how he felt and you became defensive.

    Tori, no one wins if you stay together for the kids only. I’m not judging you I’m not GOD…I feel for you both. However, if we don’t learn forgiveness and learn to give and take then its worth nothing. You have to forgive him and move on or for. Sure its like giving him a free pass but you see he is suffering too. That woman needs her ass kicked for trying to make money off this. Yet, God would not want us to feel this way about her> However, we are human and we are make mistakes too.

    Tori did you not get Dean doing the same thing? Now it has come back to bite you in the ass. Yes, we all can stand and say that to you the problem is I thought you two were great together. You have tried for so long to keep things together. You lost the Spelling money because you married him, you lost a chance to see your Dad because of him, you lost friendships because of him. You lost yourself because of him..TORI YOU need to wake up and realize you participated in this marriage and no you didn’t deserve it at all to come crashing down on you. However, neither did his ex-wife.

    Dean has real problems but, he also is terrified of losing you and he said it best why did he do it cause he didn’t think he’d get caught. So does this mean he will do it again. You better believe he will. Its in his nature. Did he mean to hurt you NO. Does he love you..YES…he wants you in his life and his kids, he wants his family. He just wanted his cake and eat it too.

    God is the answer TORI …reach up to God and ask him to help you ….all the comments are going to down Dean and what good will this do…Dean did wrong and you are HURT and rightly so.

    Learn forgiveness and I pray you can move past this and save your marriage. If not don’t drag these kids any further in this public Dean bashing. You know what your doing with this show; it is to punish him.

    Tori you said you needed to find your voice or get the truth out there..I hope you can find what it is your trying to find. You two should have worked on this in private.

    Hope you both will have more shows in the future with those precious babies and we all hope you make it. If not walk away with class.

  • Sharon

    When Dean was asked why he did this he replied…” I didn’t think I would be caught” Big RED flag.

  • Sharon L

    Tori: You health and happiness comes from YOU taking Charge of yourself and the kids. Get a nanny..Stay focus on your life and stop trying to help Dean get better. He shouldn’t be at home with the kids. Live a separate life for awhile- stop talking about him.& living for him. He did wrong & he’s the one to succeed or fail…Work on your happiness.. Dean should take counselor and doctor to Canada… So he can focus on being honest & successful. Family comes first but Dean threw this away not you !

  • Lisa

    I have been in your shoes Tori, although obviously not so publicly, but the emotions and betrayals are still the same and to me I also felt like the whole world knew. To add to the pain the other woman was my ‘best friend’, so I had a double betrayal and not even a best friend to be able to cry with. It hurts so bad and you never think you will be able to rebuild. I have felt those exact same emotions as you have been describing on the show. I remember saying to my therapist you only ever hear of those who break up, never of those who stay together, what hope do we have, surely statistically we will head down the same path. He assured me there are plenty who get through it and come out with a better and stronger relationship. Well I can tell you, 2 years on we are that statistic, we love each other today more than the day we married, we are out the other side. It has been really hard, but if the marriage is worth fighting for, you will both find a way to fight. You can get through this and stay together, but you need to fight and cry and scream and yell and feel everything that you are feeling if you are going to heal.

    • Jeremy

      You’ve been in her shoes? So you cheated on your husband too?

  • cc

    I read below on someone’s comment that you should keep things ‘private’. I think that is what has kept us all in the dark. We have all kept way too ‘private’ and I feel that this is what has kept us from moving forward in this world. We have been raised to ‘keep quiet’, ‘don’t saying anything’, ‘what will people say or think’. Maybe this is what has kept things ‘down’ inside of us and fear tends to take over. This fear keeps us it’s prisoner and it keeps us from seeing our SELF and the ‘truth’.
    The only way out of our struggle and fear and pain is to SEE the…..truth. See the truth and allow yourself to accept how things really ARE in your life, in THIS moment. If Dean has ‘cheated’, then THIS is what must be accepted….he cheated. We have a tendency to run from the truth, we have a tendency to not want to accept what has happened and this is where we get into trouble. We want to rather believe that it didn’t happen, that “I wouldn’t do that.”, but I think we have all ‘cheated’ in some form or other.
    So now, he ‘cheated’, what do YOU want? It’s time to maybe not focus on staying together, it’s time to focus on what YOU really want. Are we really all willing to do what it will take to do get to what we really want? Are you Tori, really in love with Dean? That is the question. What do YOU want? If you don’t know that you can have what you really want, then it becomes harder to GET what you want. It’s time to go into YOU and begin to see what it is that made you choose someone like Dean. What was missing in YOU that made you be attracted to him, what is it that you have really NEEDED? What was missing from your life as a child that you have been missing and that you are still missing? He doesn’t have the answer, YOU do. He can’t fill you, only you can do that.
    I am only saying this because I had the tendency to need others to make me feel good about me. I had the tendency to want to please others so that I would be loved. I was always missing the love of my mother, the real true love, the ‘unconditional’ love. I can say that Dean is searching for that too. What happened to both of you as you were children that you both needed so badly but was not given to you? Go inside your SELF and get really real with you till you find what it was that has been missing for you. You deserve to be happy, we all do. Find a way to with your SELF for some time so that you are not distracted by anything. Your children know that they are loved by you, now YOU need to let yourself have the time to find what is missing for you, they will be fine for a little while, while you sort your SELF out. Love and peace to you and yours.

  • Nora

    I also have been there, however this happened to me early on in our marriage. My husband did stop and we had 53 wonderful years together until he passed away a year ago. I miss him terribly. I forgave him years ago and never threw it up to him nor did we dwell on it. His love for me wasn’t the issue, It was like Dean’s-a spontaneous decision with lots of regret! Forgive and focus on the good things!

  • pat

    Thank you for sharing your story. We live in a country that has a love affair with love affairs and we don’t see the true pain we experience with this betrayal. Marriages end, people move on, but the road less traveled is how to recover and save your family.

  • Anastacia

    I watched your show last night because I have also gone through a similar situation. I had (and still have) the same feeling you are going through. It was 10 yrs ago and our first daughter was 9mons old. We have stayed together but not a day goes by that I don’t think about “it”. I am a stronger women and he is a better husband. However, the pain has never gone away for me and I’ll never forget or trust him again. I will never hurt my girls by leaving him. I will give up my life for them. Am I happy, yes but broken inside. I hope you can smile again someday.

  • Jenny

    Let me preface this with…. I don’t write on message boards. I barley write on FB, but I am glad you have this message board. You are the face of countless women in the world who have gone through infidelity in a relationship. You are showing what truly happens when this invades your life. It strips you of your self-esteem along with the solid security of your relationship. A simple thank you doesn’t even come close for sharing the fallout of each decision on your show. As forgiving is a personal decision for each, forgiveness is for yourself. You do not forgive the act, but you forgive for you so you can move on and heal. I wanted details like you, but I realize the details of the act is not important. That was giving her power over my feelings. What was important was his understanding of my hurt and how deeply it was ingrained in me soul. It was his actions in the fallout that I watched. His actions matched his words. Whatever road you take, you are stronger than you think and I wish you luck, love, and happiness. Hang in there, it gets better. Also, this is your life…..listen to your instincts… they are a guide for you!

  • DeAnn Honeycutt Schultz

    Thank you for being so brave to show the world what Cheating really looks like and the outcome of that very selfish decision can do to a family.
    I have been exactly where you are at ( although, after 13 months of trying to make it work, especially for my kids, I did divorce) but the fear, sadness, anger, depression… every emotion you have shared, I relive right along with you. You said it perfectly, ” whatever decision I make, I still come out loosing” . Please know that whatever decision you make… is O.K. Unfortunately I was told that because I couldn’t stay in my 20 year marriage, that I wasn’t a strong enough christian, that I didn’t pray hard enough, that I didn’t care about my children enough…etc. I pray you have nothing but love and support around you. You are a good momma and a strong woman and you deserve a beautiful life. God knows the plans He has in store for you, trust Him.

    • Guest

      The people who told you that you are not “christian enough” are sick pathetic people. They are not “christians” – they are “churchians”. They are the reason why the majority of us have turned away from organized religion.

  • Cori

    Dear Tori, I don’t know if you’ll ever see this post, but I wanted to say Thank You for sharing your sTori. This hits very close to home for me and I know how heartbreaking this is. It takes an incredible amount of courage to do what you’ve don’t in trying to work it all out, let alone being on camera. Thank you for trying! Thank you for being in love enough to try. Thank you for not running. Thank you for being vulnerable. Thank you for finding your voice. Thank you for sharing. Thank you!

  • Cherry

    I am going through the same exact thing you are going through and I want to thank you for doing this show. It is so raw and so real. And I have he same emotions. And the same feelings. It is the most difficult decision and situation I have ever been in. Stay strong and know it is not your fault. Xo

    • Guest

      So you cheated on your first husband with a known married man who had children waiting at home?! You had sex within HOURS of meeting him then sent your own husband a TEXT MESSAGE to say your marriage was over?! SHE Is representative of the woman who your husband cheated on you with yet you are supporting her?!

  • Guest

    It is absolutely amazing how all the asskissing posts stay, but all the posts that speak the TRUTH get deleted. I wonder why that is?!

    You were married to Charlie, yet had sex with dean within HOURS of meeting him?!
    You knew dean was married to Mary Jo and they had kids, yet you had sex within hours of meeting him?!
    You sent Charlie a TEXT MESSAGE to say your marriage was ending, yet you call dean a coward?!

    You blame your mother for allegedly using you and Randy as props in their career, yet you LITERALLY us your kids as props in your own TV shows?!
    You don’t want a husband, you want someone to act as a father figure.
    You claim to be broke yet spends tens of thousands each month on 3 nannies, housekeepers, assistants, shopping

    This is just the beginning. You are the most hypocritical, two-faced person there is on reality TV today and that says a LOT considering the junk on TV today! If you are honest, you would let the TRUTHFUL posts stay and not just keep the vanity posts.

    • Jeremy

      Yup, one idiot cheater married another idiot cheater, now an idiot cheater is mad that her idiot cheating husband cheated on her cheating ass. She is a hypocrite moron.

  • Amber

    The store you shop at in your episode, Jane, is that online?! Thanks Amber!!

  • Jill Curtis

    Brave, real, outstandingly courageous. That is what you are tori spelling. I only know you through the television but I must thank you for echoing my own words when I was going through this with my husband. Wow, it takes a lot for me to go out of the way to post about something and I want you to know how amazingly brave I think you are. I too questioned my foolishness and door mat status staying with my husband after he cheated. I’ve come to find out that we are some of the most brave and strong women there are, not to run from the pain, but to know what in your heart is right for you and face the pain head first in order to heal and to heal the relationship you voweled to work on. It is easier to walk away and be heart broken. Must harder to face the pain and heal from it. I am a psychotherapist and from the bottom of my heart, thank you for finding your voice. Your voice is a voice that many people have wanted to find, the voice to tell people you are going to work on your relationship no matter the pain and the judgement from others. This has to be tremendously difficult for you to show everyone the raw emotion. I want to reinforce your decision when doubt creeps in making you second guess your decision to allow people to see you and your story. Namaste.

  • LaDonna

    Much love to you and your family as you all navigate this journey you are on. The Gilmores

  • Nat

    Dear Tori, this is just my opinion so you may not like it. I am a true believer that what goes around comes around. What you put out in the universe (in God’s eyes) will come back to you eventually.
    You were cheating with Dean while he was still married/seperated from his wife and child right? Well, there you go! You do not mess with a married man. Yeah you might think you’re in heavenly bliss…this was meant to be..he’s my soul mate, in the beginning of the relationship…then …BAMMMM! You will eventually end up in the same place where you first met him. He cheated on his first wife, he will cheat on you! What goes around comes around!
    Next watch Le Ann Rimes and Eddie…just saying.

  • Kelly

    Tori. I have watched your show. This is NOT fake. The best actors in the whole world couldn’t fake this. I’m sorry its real. Truly I am and even more sorry that you have people saying its fake. They are sad and don’t waste your time on those comments.
    I have 3 children (2 back to back like your last 2). I’m
    A stay at home mom with a working husband who thinks his “job” ends at 5pm and can sit on the couch and watch me do everything.
    He also has massive weekend binge drinking and flirtation problems. He has yet to cheat, but if he were away long enough , I could see it.
    My oldest it 5 my middle is 2.5 and my youngest is 18 mos. we are busy and spread thin and have Zero alone time, but that’s not my fault just like its not Tori’s fault.
    You are an amazing, caring and hands on mom. Your children are so lucky. If the husband needs to take a step back for a few years during the few precious baby years they have and that we have to Cherish them, then so be it and the husband needs to grow the f up and appreciate their children and the childhood they have.
    Men can be so selfish and spoiled. That’s fine, woman are stronger by far. But when it comes to children and babies, all attention and love automatically poors out to them first and grown ass men need to figure it out in better ways than f-ing another woman.
    You are strong and awesome tori. I’m inspired by you. Your show gives me more strength to stick up for what I’m already feeling about my relationship.
    Please do what’s right for you. You really seem to have an honest and level head. That’s awesome. You’re children are so lucky to have such a loving mom.
    2 of my 3 kids sleep in my bed more than 3 times a week.
    They need you and honestly, you need them.
    Keep it up Tori!



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  • Cleo Everest

    Affairs are like snowflakes. Choices should never be judged. But we need to embrace that we create our reality with our choices. Hence, the situation you find yourself in today. You’ve created an opportunity to learn about infidelity. I am grateful that you are getting people to talk about this epidemic. I have great respect for anyone who survives infidelity with their sanity intact. T, use this as an opportunity to rise like a Phoenix from the Ashes. There are no wrong moves as long as the children’s interests are the priority. Love yourself.

  • Dr paul

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  • Jeremy

    Tori and Dean were BOTH married when they had an affair withe each other, so spare me the pity party bullshit. Karma is a bitch and you had to learn it the hard way. Know you know how your husband and Dean’s wife felt when you flaunted your affair you dumb bitch.

  • Jeremy

    Don’t forget idiots commenting below, Tori cheated on HER husband with Dean. Now the dumb bitch knows how Dean’s wife felt. How does it feel to be a victim of karma?

  • Eva

    Hi Tori,
    Stay strong gorgeous your are an amazingly sweet, kind and deserve nothing but happiness and love. You will get through this and become an even stronger women. Keep your head up. xox

  • Kristi

    Just got done watching the episode of your show where you are going through the storage shed and trying to let go of things…..talking about the emotional connection you have to those things because of the history around it…not because of the item itself. My mother has had the same issue with things that she has had trouble letting go of because of her emotional attachment to the history surrounding the item. One day we were sorting through some things and she just couldn’t let go of an item that she truly didn’t need to be saving… I said. “Mom…let’s take a picture of it and then we will do a scrapbook of all the photos one day and the stories that go with those photos.” It worked for her. She was able to let go of the item when she knew she could still have that memory associated with it and that there would be a scrapbook filled with those emotions and stories. You like to scrapbook and love photos….this idea might work for you too!! You let go of items you no longer need but still have the connection to it. Hope maybe that can help……

  • Reyna

    I don’t watch reality shows but I watch yours because I want to support you and your family. It would be a waste to throw your marriage away. You need to forgive and forget. Give your husband one chance and don’t wallow in it but move forward.

    I see deep love between you two. That connection is very rare and special. You may never find it again ever within your lifetime- don’t waste it. Accept what happened and start a new beginning with Dean. He is a good man- flawed he may be.

  • Maria

    Tori- I lost the love of my life because I could not forgive and forget- and it is torturous and painful to me to realize that our love and connection was so special and once-in-a-lifetime but I will be living the rest of my life without him – no other man or relationship can replace him. So we both have holes in our hearts living our lives separately – going into our own individual journeys without the other. If you feel you are psychologically and mentally haunted by what Dean did, reach out to me via my email. Having lost the one man I deeply loved and I will only love, I feel badly for others wLosing the love of their lives. I understand the dynamics of all the influences around and within your lives as I’m watching iit and I understand your fears and worries as I had been there. Your long-term psychiatrist I don’t think is if help to you- otherwise there would be no need for you to see her after all these years.

  • as I see it

    Tori- Last season I really empathized with you and I still do. I think you may be under psychic attack. Getting rid of all your possessions and moving anew would be a very good thing. Perhaps Dean and you should tale some sort of classes to do something that will keep you out of the limelight. Just because you were/are a Spelling doesn’t mean you have to be on tv or famous forever, unless you think you do. Your success and fame are within you. Forgiveness is within you as well and has to come forth from you. Your children won’t care if they live in a mansion if Mom and Dad are arch enemies. Live from love Tori. Find your true self and follow your own path. Good luck to you.

  • Patty

    So sorry…pain is real…have to stop. I can’t watch anymore. I loved your show for yrs. I want Tori back. You’re strong, funny, talented, and a Mommy. I can’t watch this anymore. Dean needs to go so you can heal. Reclaim your life.
    Said with love

  • Dottie

    Look up narcissistic personality disorder. There is no fixing this man. Everything he does is this type. You can’t win and you won’t find answers. He will keep lying. You have to find strength to leave. Not trying to be negative but this is a serious disorder. Look it up. Read some blogs and books. They know your weaknesses and use them . They are masters at this. They are like Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde. He hasn’t seemed worried about you at all. All about him. Get a new therapist. She hasn’t mentioned this once. He’s a phony.

  • Linda

    Tori needs to chill. Dean does good with the kids. You over
    Dramatic. Your not perfect either. Yes your little ones will get hurt but the way you treat dean is AWFUL. you have it in your head your the only one that can take care of your kids. Doesn’t attest if it’s dean or someone else. STOP IT
    Dean is not the one with issues. You feel with everything going on you can control your kids, beyond that in your life you cannt. Your health you keep preaching about everything but your jeopardizing your kids by risking getting sick, rather than taking the steps to take care of yourself when you can plan it, rather than waking up one day getting sick then you disrupt everything all because your nit being an adult. Life is not all about tori. We all didn’t live like you did. Please take heed Hun and quit blaming dean for everything yes he screwed up, but you make it seem he’s the bad guy. If your looking for a way out just say so and do it or if you really lived hum you would quit making him eat shit.

  • Susan Carr

    Wow-I’ve always been a Tori fan but, after watching tonight’s show, I’m just stunned. She just is SO mean to Dean and the way she told Mary Jo to stay away from her Mom because her Mom will think she’s looking for money. What a MEAN thing to say! Tori is so insecure and just lashes out. I think she created this show to make others look bad and to have people see that she’s the normal one–but, the way she treats others is making her look like a snake and a drama queen

  • Pesquie

    I just want you to know that the grass isn’t greener. Dean is the father of your children, and it seems like he loves you. I think you should let it go; you won’t be happier divorced twice, over 40 with 4 kids. Someone close to you should tell you to stop all of this before you need therapy over your divorce. You need to focus on happy positive times because focusing on negative all the time is not nourishing a relationship. Ugh, I hope someone looks out for you and stops you from destroying what you have. I’m not judging. I separated 3 times, but I was always sad without my family so we worked it out. No ones fault because it was like a constant battle of wills and it’s better to be happy then right. Good luck, don’t throw your marriage away.