He Said / She Said: TV or No TV, That Is The Question

I am a self-professed TV-aholic. There, I said it! How could I not be? I grew up the daughter of a legendary television producer. At every hour of the day, my dad was creating another hit TV show that would somehow impact our lives. To this day, people ask me questions like, “Hey, did Farrah Fawcett like, really lounge poolside at your house?” Umm…yeah, sometimes. But never in her iconic, red one piece (cue look of disappointment).


I had TV on the brain and in every room from an early age. But now, as an adult…well, not much has changed. I love TV. I’m an actress and producer, so it’s kind of necessary for my livelihood. At least that’s my story, and I’m sticking to it. But, more than anything, I’m just a really big television fan. Whether it be movies, cooking, DIY, news, gossip, or even watching Sarah Palin fish in Alaska (there was nothing else on), if it’s the boob tube (does anyone still use that reference?), I’m watching it.


Tune Into Your Relationship!

The other night, Dean walked in and voiced concern upon seeing my glazed over commitment to an E! Kourtney and Kim Take New York episode I’d seen five times already. He thinks TV shouldn’t be in our bedroom. What? Is he crazy? Apparently not. Many people, doctors, and self-help books (I might have read one or two) think that television is unhealthy for a relationship. How can this be? Are they saying that Jay Leno and the Barefoot Contessa are trying to steal my soulmate?


On the contrary, my hubby and I bond over TV shows. Yes, we have “shows” that we watch. Or let me rephrase – shows that Dean claims to hate but gets super into. He even yells at my housewives, “You’re so dumb! Lisa Vanderpump never pretended to like you!” He may claim to be indifferent when the show’s over, but I know better. We discuss housewives like two gents might discuss dueling political opponents. It’s downright intellectual.

Of course, we also talk about real life – it’s not like all we do in the bedroom is watch TV. We discuss our days, the kids, and our relationship. We even cuddle and canoodle in between cooking shows. Just kidding. Kinda. But my point is, I don’t think TV in the bedroom is unhealthy if watched sparingly. But that’s my opinion. What do you think? Do you and your partner watch TV together, and if so, where? In the bedroom? Living room? Both?


Photo Credits: Follow Your Dreams; Pinterest
  • kD

    We have one tv in the entire house. Kinda weird for me after we moved in together and then got married because I was used to having tv’s all over the house growing up (my parents bedroom, my bedroom + the living room). Now, as a married adult in a committed relationship with 2 step-children, I REALLY like having only one tv. It lets our tv time together be family oriented so the kids aren’t in their room alone watching cartoons, I’m not in our bedroom alone watching HGTV and my DH isn’t alone in the living room playing XBOX or watching action flicks! I wouldn’t mind a tv in our bedroom eventually to give us a chance to cozy up and decompress after putting the kids to sleep, but at the moment, one tv is great for our family.

  • Lisa R.

    I would also love a boob tube in every room of my house. Yes, me and my husband watch TV in our living room as well as our bedroom. We most deinitely bond over the Real Houswives of NJ. He at first pretended he was only watching it to be with me. Now, he is all hurry up its starting. I totally think it is healthy to watch and discuss TV as well as other life matters. It doesn’t always have to be so serious.


    I will not allow a TV in my bedrom, the familyroom is enough.

  • Maryfrances Botkin

    While I have a TV in my bedroom, it won’t be there for long. I feel it takes away from our time together as a couple. We have a TV in our living room and watch together, there. The bedroom is for sleeping, and for intimacy. Sure, I do other things like reading (we both read every night before turning out the light), but feel that TV takes precious time away from doing the things that truly bring a family together. That’s not to say I never watch it… I do, but we have seriously toned it down. Don’t worry, Tori — I still watch YOU!

  • Stace

    We have a television only in the living room. We used to have one in the bedroom, but we decided the bedroom is not the place to be watching TV smiley-wink.gif

  • Kimberly Purdue

    We’ve always had televisions in our bedroom since I was a kid so not putting one in there would seem sort of strange. I’ve actually never thought of not putting one in the bedroom. My fiance has to fall asleep with the TV on, but I prefer to have it off to go to sleep. I don’t believe it takes away from our time together, I actually think it gives us more snuggle time. We sit close on the couch, but when we watch TV in the bedroom we get a bit more cozy. So, yes to TV in the bedroom!!!!

  • hollabacknow

    This is the problem in our house. When my husband and I first moved in together we had a Tv in out bedroom. I find when we have one in the room he stays up longer and then I hear it the next morning how he didnt go to bed till 2 in the morning. And when the Tv is on I cant sleep at all. Im a very light sleeper. I think the bedroom should be an intimate spot and where you go to get your beauty sleep. Not to get to personal but my husband tried to get intimate with me while the tv was on and of course moment ruined cuz I heard something funny on tv and burst out laughing. I gave it a test run the other week and said if its left on and I wake up in the night because of it or he stays up late and complains the next morning that precious tv of his gets the boot. End result …. I WIN!!! smiley-smile.gif

  • Kat Whelpley

    I think for us we must be an odd couple. In our living room we don’t have a tv but there are tvs in the bedrooms (ours and the girls room). The one in the kids room is mostly used by me if I want to sneak off to watch a little TV on my own or the occational kids show for the girls. But the one in our bedroom actually is only used for a couple hours before bed and we all climb into the bed and watch TV cuddled up as a family or just me and my man. By only having TVs in the bedroom it has decreased how much we watch TV and most of our family time is not spent in front of the TV but out doing things (we are big on nature walks) so for us to have a TV in the bedroom actually turned out to be a healthier change for us because it keeps us from watching TV all day (not that I don’t occationally have my man take the kids and I spend the day in bed watching TV, I am a stay at home mom sometimes it is just needed)!

  • Amanda Joy

    I grew up with TV being a “special” one night a week thing besides news and weather! My husband on the other hand grew up with a tv always on in every room! We have a tv in the bed room but it is mostly for Sunday mornings when we curl up with coffe and toast watch tv and veg for a few hours! Its our littlle get away every sunday no cell phones no computers! Now I am not sure we needed a 42inch tv for this haha but he felt we did! I think its a personal choice for couples! If it were to take over at night and our “personal” life started to suffer I would get rid of it!

  • Candie Querbach

    I think regardless of your relationship the bedroom is meant to be a bit of a sanctuary. Peaceful, calming…

    Don’t get me wrong. I LOVE to watch tv with my man. We too have our favorite shows to watch together. But when it comes time to climb into bed, I like the fact that there isn’t a TV in the room. It gives us a distraction free envirnment to calm at the end of the day, bond, share, and yes, canoodle. 😉

  • Rachel Cronan

    Tori, I could not agree with you more!!! I love watching tv (especially my reality shows!) and I would LOVE a tv in every single room of the house! We do have a tv in our bedroom and it will not go anywhere because my hubby likes it there too. He says he needs it on to fall asleep so lucky for me, I get to keep it in the bedroom! However, he hates that I have all these shows I watch everyday. He gets so annoyed that I get so into all the reality shows (16 and Pregnant, Teen Mom, Real World, Bad Girls Club, Road Rules/Real World Challenges, Jersey Shore, Famous Food, and of course my all time fav- Tori and Dean Home Sweet Hollywood!) I believe he thinks all these shows take time away from us but I cannot live without my shows!!! It is my time of the day, as a busy mom, where I get to relax and kick back!!!

  • Jennifer Walker

    We have a TV in the bedroom but don’t use it much (the temptation to fall asleep while watching something in the dark is often too much, lol).

    On the other hand, we do watch a fair amount of television together in the living room. Our Friday night “date night” is often spent watching 2 or 3 shows that we DVRed during the week (anything from Toddlers & Tiaras to Poirot mysteries–we’re all over the place watching-wise) with the intent to watch them together. I’ve heard that television doesn’t count as quality time but I beg to differ–whatever we choose to do that evening (be it go out or stay in) is up to us and as long as we’re both participating in it–instead of being on our laptops or working on one project or another–counts. We love our TV nights!

  • Kap1289

    We alwasy watch tv together in bed. It is a great time to cuddle. I also like watching my man enjoy shows he says he hates! I feel anytime you can get some extra alone time in is definitely worth it.

  • J Hough

    We have a tv in our living room and one in our bedroom. I grew up only being allowed to watch pbs shows, very infrequently, whereas my husband’s family has their tv on all day. My childhood home had one tv in the living room, my husband had a tv in his room maybe by the time he started high school. When we got married, suddenly there was a tv in the bedroom of the apartment I rented. When we moved into our house, the tv again came into our bedroom. Like another poster said, my husband used to prefer to fall asleep to the tv, me, meh, on or off, if I was pooped, I was falling asleep regardless. Now, with 2 little girls, ages 1 and 4, having the tv in our bedroom means Sunday mornings in a jumble of sheets and pillows watching sprout or disney or whatever, even a stray cooking show here and there (Ina “Garlic” is one of my 4 year old’s favorite tv chefs). And in answer to your question Tori, yes, at least I still use the phrase “boob tube” on a regular basis. ;^)

  • Melody Hamilton

    i am a tvoholic too, mybedroom tv is larger than the one i the living room lol enuff said

  • Kimberly Gnerre

    We don’t have a tv in our bedroom, but I’d like 1 in there. We don’t really have room for 1 in there. We have 2 big screen tvs, in the living room & 1 in the family room downstairs & 1 in the guest room/my office. I have said to my hubby before, why can’t we have a tv in our bedroom & hang out like Tori & Dean do (Really I said exactly). We usually watch tv in the living room.

  • Frederieke Bernink

    I watch tv all day. However, when I go to bed I don’t. I like to relax and calm down in the hour before I go to sleep. Boyfriend E. however doesn’t watch tv during the day, but can’t go to sleep without the telly on. I just accepted it and so did he.

  • Katie O

    we decided long ago that we would only have a tv in our living room so that we would watch it as a family ect. But I am a complete tv-aholic! I love my shows all year round and so i say my one splurge or luxurey is tv/dvr and my hubs is internet

  • victoria silva

    I love the tele… and actually get quite a bit of insight… knowledge and inspiration watching Cooking shows… Home decorating shows… Wealth T.V. channel… and of course the History channel ( I am a history buff).

    I also on occasion love movies… that is if I can see any…with a teenage daughter in the house… who loves Degrassi… Teen Wolf… and a few reality shows…. including anything with Tori and Dean.

    But I gotta tell you….a tele in the bedroom is OUT!

    Makes for funky sleep… and all that radiation from the set…. ( even with flatscreens) can’t be good for the body.

    Much love and tele

    Victoria Silva

  • Kate Kruuse

    Actually I’ve just been thinking about how much i’d enjoy a tv in our bedroom for the same reasons you do! I like the idea of cuddling to watch ‘our’ shows (the Bachelorette/Bachelor, Hell’s Kitchen, Desperate Housewives, Top Gear-UK, to name a few) and cuddling on the sofa isn’t the same as in bed! We DVR our shows so we only watch TV during the times our son is down for the count. TV aside, we enjoy our ritual of family in bed for the first half hour of the waking morning!

  • Suzanne Brown

    I love this! I remember the home sweet hollywood episode when you two were discussing TV’s in every room 😉 My husband and I LOVE TV!!! We used to go to the movies several times a week when we dated but after kids we stay in and now our movie obsession has also turned to TV!! For our relationship TV is very healthy. For the most part we love the same shows but like Dean my husband pretends to not like some of it then he says Hey did you watch New Jersey housewives?

    I told him the other day when we were talking my 2 fav times of the day are when my kids wake up in the morning and then after they’ve gone to bed, I fix our evening snack (popcorn and m&m’s) and we sit down to see what our DVR has in store. We recently got Uverse you NEED it!! DVr’s 4 shows at a time and you can get EVERY channel!!!

    For us we love it it it doesn’t get in the way. Reality TV, I am DESPERATE for Home Sweet Hollywood to come back!!!!! Weeds, Entourage, true Blood, Housewives, Teen Mom we LoVe it all!!!

  • Suzanne Brown

    BTW you with the Ramona, Alex and Sonya pic priceless :)

  • Manda Dieter

    I am a huge tv-holic. I have always been. I like watching other peoples life even if it’s not real.

    My husband and i used to have a tv in our bedroom the only reason we don’t currently – small apartment. My sleep dr said not to have one either. The waves or what not gets into your brains and eats it like zombies. ha no I’m kidding but it is something of the sort. Distracts you from sleeping. I sleep in the living room w/the tv on all the time – Im normal :) Sort of.

    But DVR/Tivo – is the greatest thing EVER. I already have my fall schedule on my calendar of what i need to tape and what may over lap!

  • Squidge

    We have a t.v in our bedroom and I love it. My husband and I cuddle up and watch T.V, I like catching up on the news before bed. I also have a really hard time going to sleep my mind keeps racing so I find watching t.v and setting the sleep timer helps me get to sleep. My husband and I make time when we need to but it works for both of us.

  • Lolly Fitzpatrick

    When my fiance and I lived in a studio apartment, I actually loved being able to cuddle in bed watching TV before going to sleep. I know some say it’s not the best thing to do before sleep, but it has yet to affect me. Can’t wait to have a TV in the bedroom again.

  • Orianna Scafidi

    I love having a tv in my bedroom. As an insomnia (an issue that came about when I was still living at home during college summers and didn’t have a tv in my room) sometimes the only way I can fall asleep is by putting on a tv show I’ve seen a thousand times to fall asleep to -or by throwing on a dvr’ed movie I know every line to. I also love the bedroom tv for those times that I get ill and just want to sleep/watch movies all day. I’ve never found that the tv causes wonky sleep – in fact it helps me fall asleep!


    We have 1 TV and it’s in our living room so we watch it on our snuggly modular lounge. Sometimes though we’ll drag our mattress out in front of the TV and sleep there… soo much fun! smiley-cool.gif

  • Amanda Doerrie

    My boyfriend and I have one rule – NO TV IN THE BEDROOM… We both have even started shying away from TV more and more (especially in the Summer) – however, in the winter, it’s unavoidable (with all the new fall shows, Football, etc) – but one thing we agree on, the bedroom is for 2 things… Sleeping and Sex smiley-tongue-out.gif

  • Eliana Landa

    Hey Tori! First of all, I love your show and I’m expecting your new season this winter =D Congrats on your pregnancy <333333333 You and Dean are awesome parents, and it makes me think about my future, how you always do arts and crafts, bake cute little treats for your kids. I can't wait to teach my kids about vegetarianism, eating organic and healthy, the environment, etc. I just can't wait to be a parent, period. So anyways, about the TV conflict with you and your husband, I understand completely. My boyfriend doesn't really like watching TV as much as I do. I'm ALWAYS watching TV, even when he's over at my house. He always complains about me watching too much of it, that we're not spending time with eachother. I feel bad, but also, what is there to do? BIG problem..

    With love,


    Peace. Love. Earth

  • Misti Dawson

    I LOVE TV!! We always had a TV in our room until we moved 18 months ago. I have never slept better. But if we move where we can get a TV into our bedroom or get the money to buy a smaller TV that will fit up the stairs, I will have a TV in our room. I love Sunday afternoons in bed watching TV, miss that.

  • sabrina fairchild

    me and my husband has always had tvs in our bedrooms even while growing up. both of our familes and us too still have a tv in every room of our house. its just too addicitive. we cant live without and actually its fun having a tv in the bedroom. me and my husband watch shows together all the time. its us time. :)

  • Destiny West

    As a single mom i dont have the relationship worries from tv but my kids and i enjoy cuddling up to a show in the evening before thier bedtimes we watch The Berenstain Bears and Caillou, and Jamie Olivers cooking show Jamie at home. This is a great time for our family as we talk about our days, and I get to teach my children about healthy eating….

  • Dana Hutson

    Oh yes the tv is everywhere in our house and the discussion about it is – when can we get a bigger one! Or 3! Love the cooking shows and RFD (its about rural life)and my guilty pleasure the Kardashians(picture me looking very embarrassed).

  • Carolyn Roberson

    I don’t turn tv on until after 5 pm. I have one in my bedroom, and only watch TV there by myself. I’m kind of in a single style with the hubby gone so much. Occasionally, I will watch a movie in the den on Friday night.

  • Jamie Moore

    this makes me giggle. my husband and i both prefer totally different type of shows. one show he claims hes not a fan of is yours. but if its on, hes glued… hes a closet mcdermott fan im sure! lol

    we dont have a tv in our room. maybe when we can afford a new one. 😀

  • JenK

    I was an only child, so my sibling (growing up in the snowy mtns of CO) was our little black & white tv. I would wake up an hour before the test lines went out to watch cartoons on Saturdays…..yes, waaaay back in the day. It has been a constant companion. I’ve tried to quit, but alas, it just sucks you back in, one cooking and crochet show at a time….. I have now made it a goal to only watch 2 hours a day…so far I’ve cut down to 3-4. I know there are better things I can be doing…reading, crafting, etc…etc… I DO DVR Tori & Dean, and watch it when my hubby is away and the kids are sleeping.

    I have learned to cook better :) but we avoid the Housewives Gone Bad type shows….cleaning the toilet is um….cleaner?? We are getting rid of cable for the summer to encourage us to get out more. We will use the extra money to do more fun things with the kids! This will be the first time my husband and I have been cable free since the 80’s. One day at a time…..are there 12 step programs for TV addiction?? Hey, an idea for a new show! j/k

  • Sally Birckhead

    Like you Tori, I am a self-proclaimed TV-aholic, and (mostly) proud of it! My TV taste is pretty ecclectic – I love cooking shows (Giada and Barefoot Contessa are my favorites!), reality TV (Housewives of Beverly Hills especially), political dramas (love Homeland), game shows, sitcoms (Modern Family and Suburgatory – same night, yes!) – you name it, I love it.

    My boyfriend and I start most evenings watching TV before we fall asleep. Although I do not think this is particularly unhealthy for a relationship, I do think in some instances it can be. Just as I am a TV-aholic, he is a sports-aholic. He loves everything – football, basketball, baseball, hockey, curling, swimming, golf – if it’s a sport, he likes it. He watches the games, the highlights, reads the articles on ESPN, and catches up with every SportsCenter update that dings on his iPhone. To say the least, he and I do not necessarily enjoy the same TV, which is the cause of constant late-night debate, and in some cases, fights. We do not live together yet, but spend most nights together, at my house. I tend to get upset that he insists on hogging the remote because “It’s the playoffs, babe!”, or “It’s game one of the season” or, “I’ll lose my man-card if I miss this game!” More often than non, I concede. I have DVR, I can always catch up on my shows. But after a long day, bad day, tired day, I can get angry about the shows of his liking constantly blaring from my television. For this reason only, I do think TV can be unhealthy in the bedroom, especially for couples that do not have the same taste in entertainment.